A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red
sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also
a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license. She dug
through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What
does it look like?" she finally asked.
The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture
on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at
it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying,
"Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."
___________________________________
My brother sent along his new retirement plan. He wasn't too sure what
direction to go, since he did a little research on other ideas. For
instance...
If he had purchased $1,000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would
now be worth $49.00.
With Enron, he would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00.
With WorldCom, he would have had less than $5.00 left.
With Lucent, he would have $3.50 left of the original $1,000.00.
But, with the purchase of $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, and
then he drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum
recycling, he would have had $214.00.
Based on the above, he decided the best investment advice is to drink
heavily and recycle.
It's called the 401-Keg Plan.
____________________________________
A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart bypass
surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care
of nuns at a Catholic Hospital. As he was recovering, a nun asked
him questions regarding how he was going to pay for his treatment.
She asked if he had health insurance. He replied, in a raspy
voice, "No health insurance."
The nun asked if he had money in the bank. He replied, "No
money in the bank."
The nun asked, "Do you have a relative who could help you?"
He said, "I only have a spinster sister, who is a nun."
The nun became agitated and announced loudly, "Nuns are not
spinsters! Nuns are married to God."
The patient replied, "Send the bill to my brother-in-law
************************************************** ********************
"Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him
without an erection, make him a sandwich."
________________________________________
That's all folks.
Leah
OT: Weekend Humor 
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