FIL Update

"Emily" <me@privacy.net> wrote in message
news:MPG.1fc2f1c088c52a4c98c1ae@news.individual.ne t...
> Bozz said...
>> > You don't get airbags in all cars either. I don't have any and don't
>> > want them either thank you very much. I prefer to drive properly and
>> > sensibly so they're not needed.
>>
>> I agree about the sensible driving, but it's all the other people on the
>> road that you can't always guarantee will drive the same. My other son
>> was
>> driving along a straight road at 30mph on a dry, bright day and somebody
>> coming in the other direction didn't see him and turned across his path.
>> You
>> can't really prepare yourself for these eventualities however good a
>> driver
>> you are. Give me ABS and airbags anytime, I would hope to never use
>> either,
>> but they are there if you need them.
>>
>> So much for keeping their mum's stress levels down.
>>
> They're not 100% reliable though, so I prefer not to bother with them.
> My mother once crashed her car on the M4 (she's in her 70s - don't ask!)
> and the airbag didn't do anything at all. When I went down to Reading
> to see her (she was on her way here to south Wales from London) I
> discovered she'd cracked a couple of ribs and her sternum, and got a
> nice black eye to boot. Mind, typical of mother, her main concern was
> to get her camcorder out of the car before it blew up (it had already
> caught fire) so she can film the flames... Did I ever mention that
> sanity isn't my mother's strongest point? Mind, it's not mine either...
> <g>
>
> Wibble.
>
> --
> Em the insane

From what my lad said, the explosions when they went off nearly frightened
him to death, so what it would do to a 70 year old heaven knows.

Ian

"Bozz" <NotGiven@BTInternet.com> wrote in message
news:Rr6dnTuvFacpIMXYnZ2dnUVZ8sudnZ2d@bt.com...
>
>> Not quite sure how to take your post Ian, whilst you are statistically
>> quite
>> correct and the "mother" in me completely agrees, the "biker" in me would
>> be a complete hypocrit (riding a Suzuki VZ800 myself ;-) My hubby rode a
>> TL1000 politely nick-named the "widow-maker" but it wasn't the bike that
>> made me a widow. (Although it did become a "convertible" when I sold it
>> for a new car ;-)
>>
>> I'm sorry for the loss of your youngest's friend Ian, it's a tragedy to
>> lose a life so young, fortunately though I move in the world of bikers,
>> our losses have been comparitively few although there are a few in the
>> club that have more metal-work than when they were born.
>>
>> Hugs
>>
>> Alayne
> Alayne,
>
> It was all meant in a fatherley protective way. I was indoctrinated from
> an early age that bikes were a no-no. One of Mum's nephews was killed on a
> bike so it was absolutely forbidden to have one in my family. I do rather
> like the idea of the silver bikers though, those 40/50 somethings that
> have brought up the kids and have some money and then get a bike. Maybe at
> that age they are a little more sensible. The trouble is it's all the
> other drivers that you have to worry about.
>
> We did have a small moment of madness last week. My wife's chemo was
> cancelled last Thursday due to a low neutrophil count (as it was again
> today) so to cheer her (and me) up we splashed out on an little MR2 that
> we spotted in a garage on the way home. We drove to Cornwall for the
> weekend and had a great time. Make hay while the sun shines, well, every
> other week when she feels able - even if the sun doesn't shine.
>
> Ian
>
I do understand where you are coming from totally, which is why I would feel
so hypocritical saying to my girls that they couldn't have one when they see
their mum riding one every day ;-)

Hmmm, just to be the devils advocate I would totally disagree about the
40/50 somethings getting on a bike being more sensible. The trouble is they
probably passed their test in their teens and the bikes and the roads were a
whole different ball game in those days, add that to the fact that they can
probably afford (and to inflate their egos buy) the fastest machines on the
road, then they ride them only when the sun comes out on a Sunday.

But you are so right, it's actually the car drivers that are probably 75% to
blame in all accidents. A good biker rides on their wits and "assumes" that
all car drivers are idiots when approaching junctions etc. Obviously though
despite that accidents happen.

When I first lost my husband Tony, I did question my still riding a bike,
being the only parent left for the girls, but to take away my bike and make
me "totally responsible" (although I draw the line at purple twin sets and
baking cakes for the PTA!) would have been to completely sacrifice my very
being.

Well done on the moment of madness!! When you are thrown into a crappy
situation, I think it does the soul good to do something out of the ordinary
once in a while.

Are you doing okay with your wife's illness Ian? It's a tough situation for
all and sometimes the caregivers get overlooked.

Hugs

Alayne

> Well done on the moment of madness!! When you are thrown into a crappy
> situation, I think it does the soul good to do something out of the
> ordinary once in a while.
>
> Are you doing okay with your wife's illness Ian? It's a tough situation
> for all and sometimes the caregivers get overlooked.
>
> Hugs
>
> Alayne

I, we, are doing OK. At least on the latest chemo she can eat again. That
got really scary, not being able to eat or even really drink enough to keep
a mouse going. The worse thing was she was both hungry and thirsty all the
time. I am a pretty low maintenance type of guy, red wine helps
occasionally, OK, OK, slightly more than occasionally and those good friends
that we talked about a while back help to maintain that bit of normality
that is so important.

I'm very lucky in that I run my own business from home and a lot of the
problems can be solved over the internet so I keep trips out to the minimum.
I suppose that some people could go a little bit stir crazy together 24/7
but we just love being together. The kids are sorted, two at uni and the
third in the last year of his A levels.

Outside of the after effects of the chemo, things have not been too
gruesome, apart from the constant knowledge of what is going on and that
dangling prognosis. I worked in Path labs for many years and my wife is
(was) a nurse so we cope pretty well with the hospital thing - but only as a
day patient, overnight stays are to be avoided at ALL costs. My wife is
pretty self sufficient on the medication side and if there are any problems,
like the end of the PICC line falling of the other day when I was doing the
line care, we can always call her old workmates in the local chemo centre.

What really got to me was going supermarket shopping, by myself, for the
first time after the diagnosis. I felt totally lost and I have to say full
of self pity, was it always going to be like this? That was a long time ago
and I'm over that now. My main fears are being on my own and pain. I hate
being alone and suspect I always will hate being alone. My wife's pain
control is minimal but effective at the moment, long may it stay so.

On a good day you wouldn't know anything was wrong (apart from the head
scarf and that could be personal choice; see Norma Desmond - Sunset
Boulevard), but it can't stay that way forever. For now the bad days are
managable.

Yeah, I'm OK, gotta be really, not much choice.

Ian

Alayne said...
> Hmmm, just to be the devils advocate I would totally disagree about the
> 40/50 somethings getting on a bike being more sensible. The trouble is they
> probably passed their test in their teens and the bikes and the roads were a
> whole different ball game in those days, add that to the fact that they can
> probably afford (and to inflate their egos buy) the fastest machines on the
> road, then they ride them only when the sun comes out on a Sunday.
>
Tests weren't essential back then unless the bike was bigger than a
certain size, and a full car licence bestowed a 'right' to ride up to a
certain size sans L plates as well... so there were plenty of folk
around (me for one) who happily rode around without a care in the world.
I rode with L plates for years'n'years, and never took a bike test.

"Emily" <me@privacy.net> wrote in message
news:MPG.1fc447f81cdee2a098c1c9@news.individual.ne t...
> Alayne said...
>> Hmmm, just to be the devils advocate I would totally disagree about the
>> 40/50 somethings getting on a bike being more sensible. The trouble is
>> they
>> probably passed their test in their teens and the bikes and the roads
>> were a
>> whole different ball game in those days, add that to the fact that they
>> can
>> probably afford (and to inflate their egos buy) the fastest machines on
>> the
>> road, then they ride them only when the sun comes out on a Sunday.
>>
> Tests weren't essential back then unless the bike was bigger than a
> certain size, and a full car licence bestowed a 'right' to ride up to a
> certain size sans L plates as well... so there were plenty of folk
> around (me for one) who happily rode around without a care in the world.
> I rode with L plates for years'n'years, and never took a bike test.

Maybe one of the reasons it seems more acceptable is that be that age at
least you have had a life, made your choices and are not just getting on the
first "crazy horse" available.

Ian