How to give pain medications?

Hi J, Hi all.

I start a new thread, yet give general update as well.

Thanks for your reply. Father is changing to Tramadol, but doesn't take
it all the time:which means lots of pain at the moment the painkiller
stops working and then anger: very difficult to handle the situation,
actually we have no more clue here, so all advice is most welcome.
Palliative caretakers are not welcome either once they left the door.

Then the anger from the family that is at home with father
towards me being far far away,
is not doing me good either.

For the doc said: tramadol normally 1 week 4x20 drops, next week 30
drops, next week 40 drops and then morfine. So anybody that has a
similar experience here is most welcome to advice as well.

The Dutch group suggested to gets fathers will in order, not practical
advice when father is in pain or vomiting.

The social worker: no need to answer that one: just an example that
there are so called "helpers" that just earn a living with doing the
minimum. I did ask help for my parents , not for me, so he was way out
of line not helping, which every time I got to a new "helper" came up:
"the social worker from your parents medical can help you out here!"
And my reply was; "well: the social worker is not helping me."
So their answer was; "really???? Cannot be..."

The oncologist was clear that not giving chemo is an option to think
about, as the chemo's side effects could be worse than the positive
effects (which in best case scenario gives father a few extra months).
The confusion was that the cancerspecialist said: in my experience,
this looks like a primary colon cancer so give your father Xeloda
chemo-therapy. The oncologist says: for what I see on the scans, I
cannot conclude your father has primary colon cancer. So giving Xeloda
is like aiming hard, but maybe for the wrong target.

For communication: the "normal" bloodtest showed some probs with the
livernumbers, so a liverspecialist comes by. Then a cancer gets found,
so everything goes to a livercancer specialist. Then he diagnoses
metastatic liver cancer with undifferentiated unknown primary and we
get to go to the oncologist.
For miscommunication:
It was the liverspecialist saying that she was on the good road to
recovery
It was the cancerliverspecialist speaking from experience; coloncancer
so give Xeloda chemo vs the oncologist: I read the scans and cannot
conclude coloncancer.

Messy email I know...I said it before, its how I feel

Thanks!

SeeKim
Please drop by and give a hug of support at:
http://www.metastaticlivercancer.org

Hainan wrote:

> It was the cancerliverspecialist speaking from experience; coloncancer
> so give Xeloda chemo vs the oncologist: I read the scans and cannot
> conclude coloncancer.


Franzi had Xeloda and it gave us time we would not have had together.
The only side effects for him was food tasted odd....metallic. Not
much appetite. Stopping the Xeloda allowed a recurrence. Xeloda again
and more time. We even went to Switzerland so he could downhill ski
his beloved Alps. If your insurance covers this, I would say it is
worth a try. IF the side effects are as minimal as were Franzi's.

turtletrot1@gmail.com wrote:

> Franzi had Xeloda and it gave us time we would not have had together.

What was Franzi's cancer about?
Some people do have good results with Xeloda it seems,
and then I think: "maybe should have maybe given father that"...
(should have done this, should have done that ... those ideas drive me
nuts...)

But we don't see him skiing,
quality of life for father nowadays means not being in bed.

Thanks for reply and a very big hug to you!

SK
How to ... sometimes I dunno at:
http://www.metastaticlivercancer.org

Hainan wrote:

> turtletrot1@gmail.com wrote:
>
> > Franzi had Xeloda and it gave us time we would not have had together.
>
> What was Franzi's cancer about?

2nd re-occurence of rectal cancer, I think spread to liver
He had MRSA infection after removal of rectum.
Sometime later he had emergency surgery due to blockage in small bowel.
Temporary Ileostomy. Reversed Sep '03 No chemo/radiation.
Mid Jan 2004 Recurrent rectal tumor.
Too much happened to summarize here; (part of) it's in the archives.

> Some people do have good results with Xeloda it seems,
> and then I think: "maybe should have maybe given father that"...

Some chemos can shrink tumors; make them smaller and (sometimes) less pain.

A person has to wiegh the possible benefits vs the risks and/or side
effects.
All I can say is with his type and spread of cancer, cure is unlikely and
probably unrealistic.

> (should have done this, should have done that ... those ideas drive me
> nuts...)

We can't change the past, nor necessarily predict the future.
Don't be hard on yourself; we're only human.

> But we don't see him skiing,
> quality of life for father nowadays means not being in bed.

We can't make a decision as to what's best for your father.
If he thinks he wants to try chemo, I would suggest that he speak with his
family physican first.
Probably the person who knows his health picture best and may have time to
discuss things like his twisted bowel.
All you can do is make sure your father is informed and gets objective
opinion from his family doctor;
then support his decision(s), whatever they may be.

Best wishes and take care of you as well.
J