J's Uncle and how you can help

J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.

According to emedicine median survivial is 5-6 months which also tied
to a median age of 59, so her uncle may have less time. Hopefully
longer but as J has reminded us all that you must be realistic/

He seems to be a distance away. J has told us she has limited funds.
So I though if we could put together a list of low cost ways of
helping J and her family.

First of all J likes the book "Crossing the Creek she should give her
Aunt a copy.

also
.. have you given a copy of "crossing the creek" to your Aunt. Could
you ask her to join the group, since people would love to give her
support.

I think it would be great for us to give J a list of things that she
can do to help her Aunt. It seems like she is a distance away...and
her funds are limited.

A. J could go the library and do a search on important family days,
the day her Aunt and Uncle got married, the day her uncle was born and
any other important days.....photo copy and postage cheap.

B. Write a story of a wonderful day she spent with her Uncle. Any
family stories that have been forgotten.

C. Send a daily greeting card to her Uncle to cheer him up....

D. Ask family members to send photos of her uncle and put together a
photo alblum.

E. Contact a local hospice, they maybe able to give J some emotional
support.



Add suggestions so we can help J through this difficult time.

Alex

Visit www.treat-cancer.nl

"Alex" <usenetgirl@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1182093487.003577.232110@n60g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
> J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
> broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.
>
> According to emedicine median survivial is 5-6 months which also tied
> to a median age of 59, so her uncle may have less time. Hopefully
> longer but as J has reminded us all that you must be realistic/
>
> He seems to be a distance away. J has told us she has limited funds.
> So I though if we could put together a list of low cost ways of
> helping J and her family.
>
> First of all J likes the book "Crossing the Creek she should give her
> Aunt a copy.
>
> also
> . have you given a copy of "crossing the creek" to your Aunt. Could
> you ask her to join the group, since people would love to give her
> support.
>
> I think it would be great for us to give J a list of things that she
> can do to help her Aunt. It seems like she is a distance away...and
> her funds are limited.
>
> A. J could go the library and do a search on important family days,
> the day her Aunt and Uncle got married, the day her uncle was born and
> any other important days.....photo copy and postage cheap.
>
> B. Write a story of a wonderful day she spent with her Uncle. Any
> family stories that have been forgotten.
>
> C. Send a daily greeting card to her Uncle to cheer him up....
>
> D. Ask family members to send photos of her uncle and put together a
> photo alblum.
>
> E. Contact a local hospice, they maybe able to give J some emotional
> support.
>
>
>
> Add suggestions so we can help J through this difficult time.
>
> Alex
>

Maybe J would be kind enough to give us his name and address. We all could
mail a card occasionally.

"Alex" <usenetgirl@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1182093487.003577.232110@n60g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
> Add suggestions so we can help J through this difficult time.
>
> Alex
>
If J has access to a digital camera and printer....a photo of something
pleasant outside (a park, flowers, animals playing) to bring the world
inside to her uncle. Photo can be printed and used as a postcard.

"Heckenhocker" <nottelling@nowhere.com> wrote in message
news:4675a86b$0$5858$da0feed9@news.zen.co.uk...
>
> "Alex" <usenetgirl@gmail.com> wrote in message
> news:1182093487.003577.232110@n60g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
>> Add suggestions so we can help J through this difficult time.
>>
>> Alex
>>
> If J has access to a digital camera and printer....a photo of something
> pleasant outside (a park, flowers, animals playing) to bring the world
> inside to her uncle. Photo can be printed and used as a postcard.

J, if you don't mind me giving some input, first, I'm so sorry about your
uncle. I sounds like you can't be there and funds are low, but if you could
locate any of his neighbors that know of his problem, maybe you could tell
them that any help would be appreciated like mowing their lawn, cooking some
meals, giving your aunt a break from the hospital, so she can go for a walk
or get clothes from home.

It seems to be the little things that wear us out during times like this.
Maybe neighbors could start a meal brigade, making sure your aunt keeps
herself fed when she probably doesn't feel like cooking, and hospital food
gets expensive. It's hard when you can't be there to help, but I understand
money issues.

Just keep them in your heart and do all you can from where you are...and let
them know you care.

Peace,
Giuditta

On Jun 17, 11:56 am, "betsyb" <betsy...@TRASHoptonline.net> wrote:
> "Alex" <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>
> news:1182093487.003577.232110@n60g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
>
>
>
>
>
> > J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
> > broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.
>
> > According to emedicine median survivial is 5-6 months which also tied
> > to a median age of 59, so her uncle may have less time. Hopefully
> > longer but as J has reminded us all that you must be realistic/
>
> > He seems to be a distance away. J has told us she has limited funds.
> > So I though if we could put together a list of low cost ways of
> > helping J and her family.
>
> > First of all J likes the book "Crossing the Creek she should give her
> > Aunt a copy.
>
> > also
> > . have you given a copy of "crossing the creek" to your Aunt. Could
> > you ask her to join the group, since people would love to give her
> > support.
>
> > I think it would be great for us to give J a list of things that she
> > can do to help her Aunt. It seems like she is a distance away...and
> > her funds are limited.
>
> > A. J could go the library and do a search on important family days,
> > the day her Aunt and Uncle got married, the day her uncle was born and
> > any other important days.....photo copy and postage cheap.
>
> > B. Write a story of a wonderful day she spent with her Uncle. Any
> > family stories that have been forgotten.
>
> > C. Send a daily greeting card to her Uncle to cheer him up....
>
> > D. Ask family members to send photos of her uncle and put together a
> > photo alblum.
>
> > E. Contact a local hospice, they maybe able to give J some emotional
> > support.
>
> > Add suggestions so we can help J through this difficult time.
>
> > Alex
>
> Maybe J would be kind enough to give us his name and address. We all could
> mail a card occasionally.- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

That is an excellent idea, I have seen many hospital rooms decorated
with greeting cards...it makes the place more cheerful.

"Alex" <usenetgirl@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1182204349.244168.178210@c77g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
> On Jun 17, 11:56 am, "betsyb" <betsy...@TRASHoptonline.net> wrote:
>> "Alex" <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>>
>> news:1182093487.003577.232110@n60g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> > J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
>> > broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.
>>
>> > According to emedicine median survivial is 5-6 months which also tied
>> > to a median age of 59, so her uncle may have less time. Hopefully
>> > longer but as J has reminded us all that you must be realistic/
>>
>> > He seems to be a distance away. J has told us she has limited funds.
>> > So I though if we could put together a list of low cost ways of
>> > helping J and her family.
>>
>> > First of all J likes the book "Crossing the Creek she should give her
>> > Aunt a copy.
>>
>> > also
>> > . have you given a copy of "crossing the creek" to your Aunt. Could
>> > you ask her to join the group, since people would love to give her
>> > support.
>>
>> > I think it would be great for us to give J a list of things that she
>> > can do to help her Aunt. It seems like she is a distance away...and
>> > her funds are limited.
>>
>> > A. J could go the library and do a search on important family days,
>> > the day her Aunt and Uncle got married, the day her uncle was born and
>> > any other important days.....photo copy and postage cheap.
>>
>> > B. Write a story of a wonderful day she spent with her Uncle. Any
>> > family stories that have been forgotten.
>>
>> > C. Send a daily greeting card to her Uncle to cheer him up....
>>
>> > D. Ask family members to send photos of her uncle and put together a
>> > photo alblum.
>>
>> > E. Contact a local hospice, they maybe able to give J some emotional
>> > support.
>>
>> > Add suggestions so we can help J through this difficult time.
>>
>> > Alex
>>
>> Maybe J would be kind enough to give us his name and address. We all
>> could
>> mail a card occasionally.- Hide quoted text -
>>
>> - Show quoted text -
>
> That is an excellent idea, I have seen many hospital rooms decorated
> with greeting cards...it makes the place more cheerful.

I too have been in a hospital once or twice as every one here has. It does
make a difference.

>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> > J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
>>> > broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.
>>>
>>> > According to emedicine median survivial is 5-6 months which also tied
>>> > to a median age of 59, so her uncle may have less time. Hopefully
>>> > longer but as J has reminded us all that you must be realistic/

I think you will find that as people grow older their metabolism slows down,
this also applies to their cancer. At 82 the cancer may actually be much
less of a concern than for someone aged 59. It is common for the elderly to
die of other causes than their cancer.
The broken leg would be much more of a problem than cancer to many people
in their 80s. I haven't followed all of this thread. Was the cancer the
cause of the broken leg? If not what kind of physio was he having that would
break a leg?
MIKE

Mike Radcliffe wrote:

>
> >>> > J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
> >>> > broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.
> >>>
> >>> > According to emedicine median survivial is 5-6 months which also tied
> >>> > to a median age of 59, so her uncle may have less time. Hopefully
> >>> > longer but as J has reminded us all that you must be realistic/
>
> I think you will find that as people grow older their metabolism slows down,
> this also applies to their cancer. At 82 the cancer may actually be much
> less of a concern than for someone aged 59. It is common for the elderly to
> die of other causes than their cancer.
> The broken leg would be much more of a problem than cancer to many people
> in their 80s. I haven't followed all of this thread. Was the cancer the
> cause of the broken leg? If not what kind of physio was he having that would
> break a leg?
> MIKE

Hi Mike,
Yes, cancer was the cause of his broken femur (at or in the knee). What he was
doing at the time, I don't know. Conjecture: physio for his back or a golf
swing.
The report I got from another aunt, who is in touch daily, is that he hops back
and forth to the bathroom or from bed to wheelchair or to seat or window (etc).
For longer trips he wheels himself around the hospital and outside on the
grounds.
I hear you.
But it's hard not to feel some hope (of more time and quality of life) when
hearing how well he's doing.

Thanks for you input.
J

Heckenhocker wrote:

> "Alex" <usenetgirl@gmail.com> wrote in message
> > Add suggestions so we can help J through this difficult time.
> >
> > Alex
> >
> If J has access to a digital camera and printer....a photo of something
> pleasant outside (a park, flowers, animals playing) to bring the world
> inside to her uncle. Photo can be printed and used as a postcard.

Thanks Helen,

J

Giuditta wrote:

> "J, if you don't mind me giving some input, first, I'm so sorry about your
> uncle. I sounds like you can't be there and funds are low, but if you could
> locate any of his neighbors that know of his problem, maybe you could tell
> them that any help would be appreciated like mowing their lawn, cooking some
> meals, giving your aunt a break from the hospital, so she can go for a walk
> or get clothes from home.
>
> It seems to be the little things that wear us out during times like this.
> Maybe neighbors could start a meal brigade, making sure your aunt keeps
> herself fed when she probably doesn't feel like cooking, and hospital food
> gets expensive. It's hard when you can't be there to help, but I understand
> money issues.

Thanks Judy,
All the things you mention are covered.
She's holding up amazingly well (according to another relative).
She goes twice a day but doesn't stay long. They viisit a bit then she's back
home again.
J

"betsyb" <betsy958@TRASHoptonline.net> wrote in message
news:f56vti01bsu@news1.newsguy.com...
|
|
|
|
|
| "Alex" <usenetgirl@gmail.com> wrote in message
| news:1182204349.244168.178210@c77g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
| > On Jun 17, 11:56 am, "betsyb" <betsy...@TRASHoptonline.net> wrote:
| >> "Alex" <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote in message
| >>
| >> news:1182093487.003577.232110@n60g2000hse.googlegr oups.com...
| >>
| >>
| >>
| >>
| >>
| >> > J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
| >> > broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.
| >>
[snip]
| >
| > That is an excellent idea, I have seen many hospital rooms decorated
| > with greeting cards...it makes the place more cheerful.
|
| I too have been in a hospital once or twice as every one here has. It does
| make a difference.
|
Flowers,too.

Maybe J could visit her Aunt and Uncle. Just think how nice it will be
for the Aunt to come home and find and clean house and hot meal. Also
J may not have much quality time left. .

On Jun 21, 12:11 am, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Maybe J could visit her Aunt and Uncle. Just think how nice it will be
> for the Aunt to come home and find and clean house and hot meal. Also
> J may not have much quality time left. .

I don't understand you Alex. Is J very ill?

isi

"J" <nexsw@nvalid,anon> wrote in message
news:4677AB8E.D049586B@execulink.com...
> Mike Radcliffe wrote:
>
>>
>> >>> > J's uncle has CUP ( cancer of unknown primary site). He is 82 and
>> >>> > broke his leg, he is still in the hospital for physio.
>> >>>
>> >>> > According to emedicine median survivial is 5-6 months which also
>> >>> > tied
>> >>> > to a median age of 59, so her uncle may have less time. Hopefully
>> >>> > longer but as J has reminded us all that you must be realistic/
>>
>> I think you will find that as people grow older their metabolism slows
>> down,
>> this also applies to their cancer. At 82 the cancer may actually be much
>> less of a concern than for someone aged 59. It is common for the elderly
>> to
>> die of other causes than their cancer.
>> The broken leg would be much more of a problem than cancer to many
>> people
>> in their 80s. I haven't followed all of this thread. Was the cancer the
>> cause of the broken leg? If not what kind of physio was he having that
>> would
>> break a leg?
>> MIKE
>
> Hi Mike,
> Yes, cancer was the cause of his broken femur (at or in the knee). What he
> was
> doing at the time, I don't know. Conjecture: physio for his back or a golf
> swing.
> The report I got from another aunt, who is in touch daily, is that he hops
> back
> and forth to the bathroom or from bed to wheelchair or to seat or window
> (etc).
> For longer trips he wheels himself around the hospital and outside on the
> grounds.
> I hear you.
> But it's hard not to feel some hope (of more time and quality of life)
> when
> hearing how well he's doing.
>
> Thanks for you input.
> J
>
Hugs to my Petal on catching up with this news.

Warm Hugs

Alayne

islavision2004@yahoo.com wrote:

> On Jun 21, 12:11 am, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > Maybe J could visit her Aunt and Uncle. Just think how nice it will be
> > for the Aunt to come home and find and clean house and hot meal. Also
> > J may not have much quality time left. .
>
> I don't understand you Alex. Is J very ill?

She means "quality time with my uncle".
Hugs
J

J <nexsw@nvalid,anon> wrote in news:467C1C76.BDC8858F@execulink.com:

> islavision2004@yahoo.com wrote:
>
>> On Jun 21, 12:11 am, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> > Maybe J could visit her Aunt and Uncle. Just think how nice it will be
>> > for the Aunt to come home and find and clean house and hot meal. Also
>> > J may not have much quality time left. .
>>
>> I don't understand you Alex. Is J very ill?
>
> She means "quality time with my uncle".
> Hugs
> J
>
It gave me a start too, but I thought I'd figured it out. Thanks for
clarifying, J.

Fig

On Jun 24, 11:04 pm, Figgertoes <m...@privacy.net> wrote:
> J <nexsw@nvalid,anon> wrote innews:467C1C76.BDC8858F@execulink.com:
>
> > islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote:
>
> >> On Jun 21, 12:11 am, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
> >> > Maybe J could visit her Aunt and Uncle. Just think how nice it will be
> >> > for the Aunt to come home and find and clean house and hot meal. Also
> >> > J may not have much quality time left. .
>
> >> I don't understand you Alex. Is J very ill?
>
> > She means "quality time with my uncle".
> > Hugs
> > J
>
> It gave me a start too, but I thought I'd figured it out. Thanks for
> clarifying, J.
>
> Fig

Sorry for the confusion, from J's report her Uncle sounds lucid and
has some quality of life. J has given much advice from her internet
searches, shouldn't her family benefit from it. Also she could teach
her Aunt and or Uncle how to use the internet. I believe charity
begins at home.


She could bring the booklet she likes "Crossing the Creek" so her Aunt
can have that available to her. If her Uncle was to die at home she
can assist with home care arrangements. She can assist her Aunt with
all the pain management ideas she has suggested. J could also speak
with the health care team after making a hands on assessment, she
always wants to know what meds and treatments everyone is on, she
could do this service for her own family.

On Jun 25, 4:05 pm, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
> On Jun 24, 11:04 pm, Figgertoes <m...@privacy.net> wrote:
>
>
>
>
>
> > J <nexsw@nvalid,anon> wrote innews:467C1C76.BDC8858F@execulink.com:
>
> > > islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote:
>
> > >> On Jun 21, 12:11 am, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > >> > Maybe J could visit her Aunt and Uncle. Just think how nice it will be
> > >> > for the Aunt to come home and find and clean house and hot meal. Also
> > >> > J may not have much quality time left. .
>
> > >> I don't understand you Alex. Is J very ill?
>
> > > She means "quality time with my uncle".
> > > Hugs
> > > J
>
> > It gave me a start too, but I thought I'd figured it out. Thanks for
> > clarifying, J.
>
> > Fig
>
> Sorry for the confusion, from J's report her Uncle sounds lucid and
> has some quality of life. J has given much advice from her internet
> searches, shouldn't her family benefit from it. Also she could teach
> her Aunt and or Uncle how to use the internet. I believe charity
> begins at home.
>
> She could bring the booklet she likes "Crossing the Creek" so her Aunt
> can have that available to her. If her Uncle was to die at home she
> can assist with home care arrangements. She can assist her Aunt with
> all the pain management ideas she has suggested. J could also speak
> with the health care team after making a hands on assessment, she
> always wants to know what meds and treatments everyone is on, she
> could do this service for her own family.- Hide quoted text -
>

I really think that J is doing all she is able to do to help her Uncle
and Aunt during this time. We all know how much effort she puts into
helping us, people who are strangers to her.
Just think how much more she is giving to her family despite them
being in a distant town.

isi

islavision2004@yahoo.com wrote in
news:1182784804.011546.30980@u2g2000hsc.googlegrou ps.com:

> On Jun 25, 4:05 pm, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> On Jun 24, 11:04 pm, Figgertoes <m...@privacy.net> wrote:
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> > J <nexsw@nvalid,anon> wrote innews:467C1C76.BDC8858F@execulink.com:
>>
>> > > islavision2...@yahoo.com wrote:
>>
>> > >> On Jun 21, 12:11 am, Alex <usenetg...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> > >> > Maybe J could visit her Aunt and Uncle. Just think how nice it
>> > >> > will be for the Aunt to come home and find and clean house and
>> > >> > hot meal. Also J may not have much quality time left. .
>>
>> > >> I don't understand you Alex. Is J very ill?
>>
>> > > She means "quality time with my uncle".
>> > > Hugs
>> > > J
>>
>> > It gave me a start too, but I thought I'd figured it out. Thanks
>> > for clarifying, J.
>>
>> > Fig
>>
>> Sorry for the confusion, from J's report her Uncle sounds lucid and
>> has some quality of life. J has given much advice from her internet
>> searches, shouldn't her family benefit from it. Also she could teach
>> her Aunt and or Uncle how to use the internet. I believe charity
>> begins at home.
>>
>> She could bring the booklet she likes "Crossing the Creek" so her
>> Aunt can have that available to her. If her Uncle was to die at home
>> she can assist with home care arrangements. She can assist her Aunt
>> with all the pain management ideas she has suggested. J could also
>> speak with the health care team after making a hands on assessment,
>> she always wants to know what meds and treatments everyone is on,
>> she could do this service for her own family.- Hide quoted text -
>>
>
> I really think that J is doing all she is able to do to help her Uncle
> and Aunt during this time. We all know how much effort she puts into
> helping us, people who are strangers to her.
> Just think how much more she is giving to her family despite them
> being in a distant town.
>
> isi
>
Me too, isi. She might be able to do these things but shouldn't feel
like she needs to if she cannot. When you are a member of the family,
that can change everything. What's the old saying about a doctor who
doctors himself has a fool for a patient - something like that? Doctors
don't usually treat their own families for good reason. Sometimes we
need to leave the technical parts to others on the outside who are not
emotionally involved.

Fig