Leaving hosipital against docs orders

Grrrr!! Once again my hubby can find away to make an already
complicated situation more complicated (bless his heart). His 7 days
of chemo ends tonight and he's leaving the hosipital and coming home
immediatly. His onco flat out told him that if he leaves his chances of
survival plummet considerably. (Especially since he's leaving a big
city with a big hosipital to come home to a small town and a painfully
small unequipped hosipital)
I'm trying REALLY hard to respect his decision but with his WBC quickly
dropping and 2 small kids with germs flying everywhere, I think he's
being careless with his health. (Still think he's informed and
realistic?) Last time he had induction therapy, he had liver
malfunctions, an infection, 2 high fevers. He's coming home, risking
that happening and our only choice will be to go to that pathetic
hosipital across town. (The same one that had staff who knew nothing
about leukemia and had hardly any cancer experience AT ALL) He refuses
to stay and even says he probably won't go back. Sounds like it's time
for me to accept that he's gonna die without a fight. He says laughter
is the best medicine, and he needs to be happy to get better. I agree
to a point. Ugh. I'm to stressed to type. I'll let y'all know what
happens.

--

BetsyB

"Lori" <lorisflurry@yahoo.ca> wrote in message
news:1164841292.309675.285570@n67g2000cwd.googlegr oups.com...
> Grrrr!! Once again my hubby can find away to make an already
> complicated situation more complicated (bless his heart). His 7 days
> of chemo ends tonight and he's leaving the hosipital and coming home
> immediatly. His onco flat out told him that if he leaves his chances of
> survival plummet considerably. (Especially since he's leaving a big
> city with a big hosipital to come home to a small town and a painfully
> small unequipped hosipital)
> I'm trying REALLY hard to respect his decision but with his WBC quickly
> dropping and 2 small kids with germs flying everywhere, I think he's
> being careless with his health. (Still think he's informed and
> realistic?) Last time he had induction therapy, he had liver
> malfunctions, an infection, 2 high fevers. He's coming home, risking
> that happening and our only choice will be to go to that pathetic
> hosipital across town. (The same one that had staff who knew nothing
> about leukemia and had hardly any cancer experience AT ALL) He refuses
> to stay and even says he probably won't go back. Sounds like it's time
> for me to accept that he's gonna die without a fight. He says laughter
> is the best medicine, and he needs to be happy to get better. I agree
> to a point. Ugh. I'm to stressed to type. I'll let y'all know what
> happens.
That scares me and I don't have to deal with it. How does he think he is
getting home? Isn't there a Teacher's conference you need to be at? Almost
any excuse will do for today.
Good luck.

Lori wrote:

> Grrrr!! Once again my hubby can find away to make an already
> complicated situation more complicated (bless his heart). His 7 days
> of chemo ends tonight and he's leaving the hosipital and coming home
> immediatly. His onco flat out told him that if he leaves his chances of
> survival plummet considerably. (Especially since he's leaving a big
> city with a big hosipital to come home to a small town and a painfully
> small unequipped hosipital)

Hello Lori,
I have a suggestion. Carry on as usual at home; be friendly and join in
when you can if he's has favorite TV shows, or music. And try not to
stress out nor argue with him.

He's sure been erratic. Wondering if some pals of his arrived to "party"
with him in his private room and/or watch TV with him, and why he cancelled
the relatives from visiting. Or if he's on drugs?

If he gets sick enough, you do have a choice.
Call an ambulance and instruct them to take him to the hospital in the big
city.

First you need a letter from the oncologist stating what he's said (above).

Call the onc's office and ask that the letter be faxed somewhere so you can
have it handy.

I think the ambulance people send the bill later.
(Check this out).
http://www.health.gov.on.ca/english/.../ohip/amb.html
Looks like it's $45.00 but could be more if he's going further from the
local hospital.
There's a number there to call - best to call and make sure nothing's
changed or inquire further.
The co-pay is forgiven if he's on welfare, or disability, but might have to
pay the extra fee to go further.
If he skips out before the ambulance arrives, then cancel them ASAP.
If they get him there and he skips out again, then I guess you'll have to
let it go.
Can't do much else if he refuses further treatment.
There might be a hospice wing at the local hospital.
Inquire about that as well and have the information handy.

That's about all you can do and protect yourself and your children.
Do the best you can, Lori. That's all each human can do for others.
Hugs
J

On 29 Nov 2006 15:01:32 -0800, "Lori" <lorisflurry@yahoo.ca> wrote:

>Grrrr!! Once again my hubby can find away to make an already
>complicated situation more complicated (bless his heart). His 7 days
>of chemo ends tonight and he's leaving the hosipital and coming home
>immediatly. His onco flat out told him that if he leaves his chances of
>survival plummet considerably. (Especially since he's leaving a big
>city with a big hosipital to come home to a small town and a painfully
>small unequipped hosipital)
>I'm trying REALLY hard to respect his decision but with his WBC quickly
>dropping and 2 small kids with germs flying everywhere, I think he's
>being careless with his health. (Still think he's informed and
>realistic?) Last time he had induction therapy, he had liver
>malfunctions, an infection, 2 high fevers. He's coming home, risking
>that happening and our only choice will be to go to that pathetic
>hosipital across town. (The same one that had staff who knew nothing
>about leukemia and had hardly any cancer experience AT ALL) He refuses
>to stay and even says he probably won't go back. Sounds like it's time
>for me to accept that he's gonna die without a fight. He says laughter
>is the best medicine, and he needs to be happy to get better. I agree
>to a point. Ugh. I'm to stressed to type. I'll let y'all know what
>happens.
His decision may not be as bad as it seems. The bigger the hospital,
the nastier bugs that live in it, and the more likely they are to be
antibiotic resistant. Let me give you a couple of datapoints. I have
daughter who was born premature. She went home at a weight of 4 pounds
0 ounces. Her Pediatrician concluded she was safer at home, even at
that weight and level of prematurity, than in a hospital.

Earlier this year, I nearly died of Hospital acquired MRSA Sepsis. It
was unrelated to Cancer, or Cancer treatment. The mortality rate for
MRSA sepsis (a blood infection) is 50%. If I hadn't been in hospital,
I wouldn't have had the IV line, and I probably wouldn't have been
exposed to MRSA.

Whew. Busy few days. Murray came home. His sister picked him up.
She had to. He would have hitchhiked home anyway. He was home for one
day and developed a fever (40C)
with severe abdominal pain. He's back in the hosipital and grumpy as
ever. You wouldn't believe his reason for coming home. I'm embarassed
to even say it the way he did so I'll just say he wanted me to know how
much he loves me. LOL. If y'all know what I mean. I think he spent
too much time looking at the cute nurses.lol.
So, they have run a few tests on him and concluded that he has some
kind of strep bacteria. Dr. said he could have picked it up anywhere.
He's being treated and hopefully all goes well.
As for me. I went to my ultrasound and there was many nodules in my
thyroid. Mostly small ones then the big one at the front. My doc's
office called me yesterday and made an appt. They say my doc wants to
"talk" about the results. Never a good sign. I'm guessing he'll be
sending me for more tests. I talked to my grandma and learned that all
the women in her generation (my great aunts etc) all have underactive
thyroid and all take pills for it and all developed the condition
around my age and a little older. I'm just hoping that's the extent of
the problem. It's weird, I'm not scared for me. I'm scared for Murray
and the kids. I have such a hard time getting anyone to watch the boys
while I go to the hosipital or X-mas shopping or whatever, I don't know
what will happen to them if I go in for surgery.
Lori




> Grrrr!! Once again my hubby can find away to make an already
> complicated situation more complicated (bless his heart). His 7 days
> of chemo ends tonight and he's leaving the hosipital and coming home
> immediatly. His onco flat out told him that if he leaves his chances of
> survival plummet considerably. (Especially since he's leaving a big
> city with a big hosipital to come home to a small town and a painfully
> small unequipped hosipital)
> I'm trying REALLY hard to respect his decision but with his WBC quickly
> dropping and 2 small kids with germs flying everywhere, I think he's
> being careless with his health. (Still think he's informed and
> realistic?) Last time he had induction therapy, he had liver
> malfunctions, an infection, 2 high fevers. He's coming home, risking
> that happening and our only choice will be to go to that pathetic
> hosipital across town. (The same one that had staff who knew nothing
> about leukemia and had hardly any cancer experience AT ALL) He refuses
> to stay and even says he probably won't go back. Sounds like it's time
> for me to accept that he's gonna die without a fight. He says laughter
> is the best medicine, and he needs to be happy to get better. I agree
> to a point. Ugh. I'm to stressed to type. I'll let y'all know what
> happens.

"Lori" <lorisflurry@yahoo.ca> wrote in message
news:1165319471.320129.17160@l12g2000cwl.googlegro ups.com...
> Whew. Busy few days. Murray came home. His sister picked him up.
> She had to. He would have hitchhiked home anyway. He was home for one
> day and developed a fever (40C)
> with severe abdominal pain. He's back in the hosipital and grumpy as
> ever. You wouldn't believe his reason for coming home. I'm embarassed
> to even say it the way he did so I'll just say he wanted me to know how
> much he loves me. LOL. If y'all know what I mean. I think he spent
> too much time looking at the cute nurses.lol.

Hey Lori, you can't help it if you're irresistible. I bet that when you said
you wanted a hot man you didn't mean 40 Deg C though.

Ian

Lori wrote:

> <snip - I can't say any better than Bozz did about your husband wanting to
> go home]

I wonder if there's daycare in the city or hospital where he's being treated?

You could go visit and leave the kids there for an hour or so, while you and
hubby have a private <wink> visit in his private room.

> He's being treated and hopefully all goes well.
> As for me. I went to my ultrasound and there was many nodules in my
> thyroid. Mostly small ones then the big one at the front. My doc's
> office called me yesterday and made an appt. They say my doc wants to
> "talk" about the results. Never a good sign. I'm guessing he'll be
> sending me for more tests. I talked to my grandma and learned that all
> the women in her generation (my great aunts etc) all have underactive
> thyroid and all take pills for it and all developed the condition
> around my age and a little older. I'm just hoping that's the extent of
> the problem. It's weird, I'm not scared for me. I'm scared for Murray
> and the kids. I have such a hard time getting anyone to watch the boys
> while I go to the hosipital or X-mas shopping or whatever, I don't know
> what will happen to them if I go in for surgery.

I'm sure we'll find a solution, Lori, for the kids if you need surgery.
Thyroid problems do run in families. There's 4 in our family or was when Dad
was alive.
Maybe there will be extra tests - won't know until you get there what they
suggest.
I'm sure it's a nuisance taking time off work or finding care for the kids
during these appointments.
One foot at a time; one problem at a time. You'll get through it.
Get lots of rest as you able. We'll be here.
And thanks for your update, Lori
J

LOL Ian!!
Bozz wrote:
> "Lori" <lorisflurry@yahoo.ca> wrote in message
> news:1165319471.320129.17160@l12g2000cwl.googlegro ups.com...
> > Whew. Busy few days. Murray came home. His sister picked him up.
> > She had to. He would have hitchhiked home anyway. He was home for one
> > day and developed a fever (40C)
> > with severe abdominal pain. He's back in the hosipital and grumpy as
> > ever. You wouldn't believe his reason for coming home. I'm embarassed
> > to even say it the way he did so I'll just say he wanted me to know how
> > much he loves me. LOL. If y'all know what I mean. I think he spent
> > too much time looking at the cute nurses.lol.
>
> Hey Lori, you can't help it if you're irresistible. I bet that when you said
> you wanted a hot man you didn't mean 40 Deg C though.
>
> Ian

Thanks for your support everyone!! I'm a little rushed right now but
I'll give a quick update. Murray is still in the hosipital. His mouth
is very sore. He couldn't talk a couple days ago. His cell counts
aren't going back up yet. I can't remember if thats normal. His chemo
was 2 weeks ago (7days of chemo) and his white count his only 0.3 right
now. His platelets despite numerous transfusions aren't staying up.
They increased his neupagen (spelled wrong I'm sure) from 300-600 but
the whites still aren't going up. What does this mean? Is it typical?
No match has been found for stemcell/bone marrow donor which worries me
alot and I'm currently fighting the hosipital to have his parents and
half sister tested. (looks like I'm winning too, they've agreed to
test the half sister so far) I better run. Later
J wrote:
> Lori wrote:
>
> > <snip - I can't say any better than Bozz did about your husband wanting to
> > go home]
>
> I wonder if there's daycare in the city or hospital where he's being treated?
>
> You could go visit and leave the kids there for an hour or so, while you and
> hubby have a private <wink> visit in his private room.
>
> > He's being treated and hopefully all goes well.
> > As for me. I went to my ultrasound and there was many nodules in my
> > thyroid. Mostly small ones then the big one at the front. My doc's
> > office called me yesterday and made an appt. They say my doc wants to
> > "talk" about the results. Never a good sign. I'm guessing he'll be
> > sending me for more tests. I talked to my grandma and learned that all
> > the women in her generation (my great aunts etc) all have underactive
> > thyroid and all take pills for it and all developed the condition
> > around my age and a little older. I'm just hoping that's the extent of
> > the problem. It's weird, I'm not scared for me. I'm scared for Murray
> > and the kids. I have such a hard time getting anyone to watch the boys
> > while I go to the hosipital or X-mas shopping or whatever, I don't know
> > what will happen to them if I go in for surgery.
>
> I'm sure we'll find a solution, Lori, for the kids if you need surgery.
> Thyroid problems do run in families. There's 4 in our family or was when Dad
> was alive.
> Maybe there will be extra tests - won't know until you get there what they
> suggest.
> I'm sure it's a nuisance taking time off work or finding care for the kids
> during these appointments.
> One foot at a time; one problem at a time. You'll get through it.
> Get lots of rest as you able. We'll be here.
> And thanks for your update, Lori
> J

Sorry to hear about your husband. Why would the hospital fight to have a
relative tested?
The counts are very low. Here is the US the number the docs look at is the
ANC.
Here is a page on how to calculate the ANC, you need to know the diff to
make the calculation.
http://www.globalrph.com/anc.htm

The hospitals here in the US do not advise children to visit patients with
low blood counts, and it they do they need to be supervised due to the
reverse precautions.