My husband

Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.

He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
chest, and it wasn't moving.

We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.

The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I didn't
know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me even more proud
to have him as a husband and best friend. They constantly remarked on his
kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now they're saying he's in the best band
ever, jamming with Harrison, Lennon, etc., but I just pray he's able somehow
to know how much we all love him and always will.

Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all arrangements
and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't think I could have
handled all that right now.

I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my life. I
hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or whatever you'd call
it in this ng.

Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
sons will also participate in if they feel able.

Love to you all for your compassion.
Warm group hug,
Giuditta
(Judith)

BetsyB



"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net...
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
> The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I
> didn't know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me even
> more proud to have him as a husband and best friend. They constantly
> remarked on his kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now they're saying he's
> in the best band ever, jamming with Harrison, Lennon, etc., but I just
> pray he's able somehow to know how much we all love him and always will.
>
> Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all
> arrangements and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't think
> I could have handled all that right now.
>
> I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my life.
> I hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or whatever you'd
> call it in this ng.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)

Judy, I am so sorry and relieved for you and the family. This is probably
the hardest part of the healing process.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Betsy

Giuditta wrote :

"Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7."

Dear Giudatta,

My best wishes, and prayers, go out to you and your family in this time.

sincerely, Uncle Sally

Giuditta wrote:

>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.

I shall. My deepest condolences to you and your family.

Hugs,
Janet

--
Janet Wilder
Bad spelling. Bad punctuation
Good Friends. Good Life

Dear Giuditta: I am so sorry for the loss of your husband and best friend. I
had the feeling that the end was near for him (from your last post). I am
happy that he died peacefully and is in no more pain. You were a constant
support for him I'm sure he knows how much you loved him. Please stick
around this newsgroup. You are a tremendous help to others. I am thinking of
you during the viewing and the funeral.
Gail
"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net...
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
> The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I
> didn't know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me even
> more proud to have him as a husband and best friend. They constantly
> remarked on his kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now they're saying he's
> in the best band ever, jamming with Harrison, Lennon, etc., but I just
> pray he's able somehow to know how much we all love him and always will.
>
> Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all
> arrangements and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't think
> I could have handled all that right now.
>
> I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my life.
> I hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or whatever you'd
> call it in this ng.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)
>

Giuditta wrote:
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
> The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I didn't
> know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me even more proud
> to have him as a husband and best friend. They constantly remarked on his
> kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now they're saying he's in the best band
> ever, jamming with Harrison, Lennon, etc., but I just pray he's able somehow
> to know how much we all love him and always will.
>
> Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all arrangements
> and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't think I could have
> handled all that right now.
>
> I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my life. I
> hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or whatever you'd call
> it in this ng.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)
>
>
Dear Judith.

I am so very sorry. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Best wishes and ((hugs))

Caz.
Scott's mom

Giuditta wrote:

> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
I have been watching your posts for all these months now hoping to hear
he was improving. You have been really courageous, your love for him
has shown through and I truly am sorry to hear that Don did not make it.

We are all poorer losing him.

***************************************
* This is the Spammish Inquisition *
* Not Lumber Cartel Unit 75 [TINLC] *
* I am not SPEWS.ORG *
***************************************

On Apr 29, 5:48 pm, "Giuditta" <jma...@myspeedworks.com> wrote:
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My

Dearest G Judith,

I am so sorry to learn your news about Don yet relieved to know he
slipped out the door peacefully and is now free of pain in musical
heaven. I am sure he knows how much you and the rest of the family
love him, angels know those sort of things.

Please do come and say hi when you are ready, you have become almost
like family.

You have been so courageous over these past months, God bless you and
continue to give you strength.

Hugs
isi

"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote >
Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.

Judith, my prayers are with you and your family. Good that you could be
there at the last and the end was peaceful. I shall regard any music I hear
tomorrow as celebration of Don.

HH

Judith you and your family and loved ones are on my prayer list!


(((HUGS)))

On Sun, 29 Apr 2007 09:48:57 -0500, "Giuditta"
<jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote:

>Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
>updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
>He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
>Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
>chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
>We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
>The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I didn't
>know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me even more proud
>to have him as a husband and best friend. They constantly remarked on his
>kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now they're saying he's in the best band
>ever, jamming with Harrison, Lennon, etc., but I just pray he's able somehow
>to know how much we all love him and always will.
>
>Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all arrangements
>and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't think I could have
>handled all that right now.
>
>I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my life. I
>hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or whatever you'd call
>it in this ng.
>
>Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
>funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
>sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
>Love to you all for your compassion.
>Warm group hug,
>Giuditta
>(Judith)

Judith,

I'm sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and
your family. The musical celebration sounds lovely.

Sincere condolences,
Carla
>

"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net:

> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping
> you updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My
> daughter Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I
> glanced at his chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
> The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I
> didn't know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me
> even more proud to have him as a husband and best friend. They
> constantly remarked on his kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now
> they're saying he's in the best band ever, jamming with Harrison,
> Lennon, etc., but I just pray he's able somehow to know how much we
> all love him and always will.
>
> Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all
> arrangements and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't
> think I could have handled all that right now.
>
> I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my
> life. I hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or
> whatever you'd call it in this ng.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow
> the funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life
> that his sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)
>
>
Judith,

I am relieved that Don is free from pain. And now he is making the
sweetest music of all. My heart goes out to you & your family. It sounds
like you have planned a lovely & fitting tribute to Don. .Please do stay
with us & check in so we know you're OK.


Hugs,
Fig

"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net...
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.

So sorry for your loss, Alex

maryanne kehoe wrote:


> Judith you and your family and loved ones are on my prayer list!
>
> (((HUGS)))


With "friends" like Kehoe you lack not enemies...

--
Best
Greg

Giuditta wrote:

> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.

Deepest sympathy in your time of sorrow, Judy.
Your love for and fond memories of Don will last forever; but for now, let the
tears fall.
** hugs **
J

Giuditta schreef:
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)
>
>
>
Hi Guiditta,

I'm very sorry to hear of the loss of your husband. My deepest
condolences for you and the children. Very sad that you and Don didn't
have more time to spend together. He's at peace now, but I so wished for
you both that he would recover and feel better at least for a while ,
since he had been so sick from the chemo and the cancer. . The past few
weeks it became more and more obvious that that wouldn't happen and felt
sad for the both of you. . I did feel the love for Don you have in your
posts and I really admire the way you never gave up, cared for him,
still hoped for recovery and stood by him.

I hope in time you and your children find a way to cope with this loss
and am "glad"that Don doesn't have to be in pain anymore since he was so
sick and had no energy left, but he died much to young and you and the
children still needed him, it's hard to accept death when it comes to soon.

I wish you strength with the funeral and hope it will be a beautiful
good bye and tribute to Don.

Anne

"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net...
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
> The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I
> didn't know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me even
> more proud to have him as a husband and best friend. They constantly
> remarked on his kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now they're saying he's
> in the best band ever, jamming with Harrison, Lennon, etc., but I just
> pray he's able somehow to know how much we all love him and always will.
>
> Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all
> arrangements and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't think
> I could have handled all that right now.
>
> I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my life.
> I hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or whatever you'd
> call it in this ng.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)
>
Dear Judith, I am so sorry to hear of your loss and I send my heartfelt
sympathy to you and your family. When we lose someone we love so dearly
sometimes it can help a little to remember this he is no longer suffering or
in pain. I am so glad that his finally journey was pain free and hope that
he has truly found peace now. Although we lose our loved ones in a bodily
way, they are forever lurking in our hearts and in our memories. The
grieving process is also a rollercoaster ride (and we'll be here to offer
comfort) but some day in the future, your memories of Don will bring smiles
rather than many tears.

Warm Hugs to you and your family

Alayne

Thank all of you for your kind words. I do have a big family and feel like
all of you are now part of it, so you might have to put up with me some.

Again, I can't thank you all enough for the advice, the info, the
encouragement and the honesty you offered me since November 7.

During Don's last day and night at the hospital, I crawled up in bed beside
him and hope he knew I was there. It seemed as if he were fighting for air,
but the nurses gave him meds to help him relax, morphine I assume.

I was glad when the room cleared of folks that night, and I finally had time
alone with him. Both our sons had gigs that they thought they should cancel,
but I told them their dad would tell them to go play music, so they did.

I talked to Don during the night and told him that we would be okay and that
he could relax and let go. I finally let go as well. I believe he was
fighting for his life because he knew we needed him.

When he knew it was okay, he finally did let go, and the suffering ended. I
told him I would love him forever as the kids would also. I told him that
when I saw the brightest star in the sky that I would know it was him,
saying that he was okay.

Last night Donnie called me four tmes from his concert and said he knew his
dad wanted him to play music and be happy, but Donnie told me that he felt
guilty for trying to act happy while he was playing. I told him about the
star thing I told Don, and Donnie asked me where this bright star was, and
he said that he too saw that star and had the same feeling.

Donnie said that he dreamed that Don and his mom were dancing to swing music
not knowing that she did teach Don the music of that era. Don never danced
because he was always playing every time we went out, so Donnie was shocked
when I told him about Don and his mom dancing around their house...it was
just like his dream.

Also, when I was beside Don in bed, I turned my head and saw a vision of
Don, standing in the corner of the room with his long hair and jeans on and
an expression on his face that revealed that he was okay.

I wanted to share this with you all because it was a confirmation that there
is a destination. Don is now our guardian angel, we know this. He's not in
pain, not gasping for air, not worrying about anything. You can't imagine
the peaceful feeling that has blanketed our home.

Sure, I have my low moments because I miss him, but there's a certain other
feeling that is calming to all of us. The memory of him and his brightness
will live on forever here.

We're all okay. Maybe it's also all the prayers and good vibes from you all,
and I thank you again.

I do have a question though. Do I use the Mrs. before my name, or is it Ms?
I've never been a widoe before, so I need to know.

Tomorrow will be exhausting. The crowd today was just a sampling of what's
to come, snd we're so tired. They follow us home and stay too long. I'm glad
that he was so loved, but we are wanting peace and time to reflect and just
be together, our family.

God bless you each and every one,

Giuditta
(Judy ... Giuditta is the name my Italian grandmother gave me, which
translates to Judith)

Giuditta wrote:
> Thank all of you for your kind words. I do have a big family and feel like
> all of you are now part of it, so you might have to put up with me some.
>
> Again, I can't thank you all enough for the advice, the info, the
> encouragement and the honesty you offered me since November 7.
>
> During Don's last day and night at the hospital, I crawled up in bed beside
> him and hope he knew I was there. It seemed as if he were fighting for air,
> but the nurses gave him meds to help him relax, morphine I assume.
>
> I was glad when the room cleared of folks that night, and I finally had time
> alone with him. Both our sons had gigs that they thought they should cancel,
> but I told them their dad would tell them to go play music, so they did.
>
> I talked to Don during the night and told him that we would be okay and that
> he could relax and let go. I finally let go as well. I believe he was
> fighting for his life because he knew we needed him.
>
> When he knew it was okay, he finally did let go, and the suffering ended. I
> told him I would love him forever as the kids would also. I told him that
> when I saw the brightest star in the sky that I would know it was him,
> saying that he was okay.
>
> Last night Donnie called me four tmes from his concert and said he knew his
> dad wanted him to play music and be happy, but Donnie told me that he felt
> guilty for trying to act happy while he was playing. I told him about the
> star thing I told Don, and Donnie asked me where this bright star was, and
> he said that he too saw that star and had the same feeling.
>
> Donnie said that he dreamed that Don and his mom were dancing to swing music
> not knowing that she did teach Don the music of that era. Don never danced
> because he was always playing every time we went out, so Donnie was shocked
> when I told him about Don and his mom dancing around their house...it was
> just like his dream.
>
> Also, when I was beside Don in bed, I turned my head and saw a vision of
> Don, standing in the corner of the room with his long hair and jeans on and
> an expression on his face that revealed that he was okay.
>
> I wanted to share this with you all because it was a confirmation that there
> is a destination. Don is now our guardian angel, we know this. He's not in
> pain, not gasping for air, not worrying about anything. You can't imagine
> the peaceful feeling that has blanketed our home.
>
> Sure, I have my low moments because I miss him, but there's a certain other
> feeling that is calming to all of us. The memory of him and his brightness
> will live on forever here.
>
> We're all okay. Maybe it's also all the prayers and good vibes from you all,
> and I thank you again.
>
> I do have a question though. Do I use the Mrs. before my name, or is it Ms?
> I've never been a widoe before, so I need to know.
>
> Tomorrow will be exhausting. The crowd today was just a sampling of what's
> to come, snd we're so tired. They follow us home and stay too long. I'm glad
> that he was so loved, but we are wanting peace and time to reflect and just
> be together, our family.
>
> God bless you each and every one,
>
> Giuditta
> (Judy ... Giuditta is the name my Italian grandmother gave me, which
> translates to Judith)
>
>
>
>
>
Dear Judy/Giuditta

Such a touching post. Made me cry. Not to take away from your pain or
your post, but it just reminds me so much of Scott. I'm sure you are
like me, so relieved that his passing was peaceful. I'm so pleased for
you that you saw Don in the corner and for the peaceful feeling that
envelopes you all. Once again Judy I am so sorry.

For your question about keeping the Mrs. before your name I believe it
is perfectly acceptable. You are still Don's wife until you decide
otherwise. I kept the Mrs. before my name when Scott's father died. I
kept it until after I met and married my second husband.


Sending ((hugs)) to you all and peaceful vibes.

Caz.
Scott's mom

Giuditta schreef:
> We're all okay. Maybe it's also all the prayers and good vibes from you all,
> and I thank you again.
>

I'm glad you're okay for now Guiditta, but like someone else already
said, it's a roller coaster ride and though you feel Don is in a good
place you'll miss him a lot in the future and there will be times of
very big sadness and feeling of loss. How could there not be if you lose
a husband and partner for so many years, through thick and thin. Don't
be afraid if you have a big set back when all the adrenaline is gone and
things settle down after the funeral. It's good you have friends and a
big family for support.
> I do have a question though. Do I use the Mrs. before my name, or is it Ms?
> I've never been a widoe before, so I need to know.
>

You'll always be a mrs. as far as I know, it would be a bit odd when
that was different. We don't even have Ms. in our country anymore ;-)
>
> Giuditta
> (Judy ... Giuditta is the name my Italian grandmother gave me, which
> translates to Judith)
>

I like Guiditta. The world is full of Judith's but I don't "know "any
Guiditta's except for you.

Take care and all the best. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. It will be
a very emotional funeral.

Anne
>
>
>
>
>

Giuditta wrote:
> Thank all of you for your kind words. I do have a big family and feel like
> all of you are now part of it, so you might have to put up with me some.
>
> Again, I can't thank you all enough for the advice, the info, the
> encouragement and the honesty you offered me since November 7.
>
> During Don's last day and night at the hospital, I crawled up in bed beside
> him and hope he knew I was there. It seemed as if he were fighting for air,
> but the nurses gave him meds to help him relax, morphine I assume.
>
> I was glad when the room cleared of folks that night, and I finally had time
> alone with him. Both our sons had gigs that they thought they should cancel,
> but I told them their dad would tell them to go play music, so they did.
>
> I talked to Don during the night and told him that we would be okay and that
> he could relax and let go. I finally let go as well. I believe he was
> fighting for his life because he knew we needed him.
>
> When he knew it was okay, he finally did let go, and the suffering ended. I
> told him I would love him forever as the kids would also. I told him that
> when I saw the brightest star in the sky that I would know it was him,
> saying that he was okay.
>
> Last night Donnie called me four tmes from his concert and said he knew his
> dad wanted him to play music and be happy, but Donnie told me that he felt
> guilty for trying to act happy while he was playing. I told him about the
> star thing I told Don, and Donnie asked me where this bright star was, and
> he said that he too saw that star and had the same feeling.
>
> Donnie said that he dreamed that Don and his mom were dancing to swing music
> not knowing that she did teach Don the music of that era. Don never danced
> because he was always playing every time we went out, so Donnie was shocked
> when I told him about Don and his mom dancing around their house...it was
> just like his dream.
>
> Also, when I was beside Don in bed, I turned my head and saw a vision of
> Don, standing in the corner of the room with his long hair and jeans on and
> an expression on his face that revealed that he was okay.
>
> I wanted to share this with you all because it was a confirmation that there
> is a destination. Don is now our guardian angel, we know this. He's not in
> pain, not gasping for air, not worrying about anything. You can't imagine
> the peaceful feeling that has blanketed our home.
>
> Sure, I have my low moments because I miss him, but there's a certain other
> feeling that is calming to all of us. The memory of him and his brightness
> will live on forever here.
>
> We're all okay. Maybe it's also all the prayers and good vibes from you all,
> and I thank you again.
>
> I do have a question though. Do I use the Mrs. before my name, or is it Ms?
> I've never been a widoe before, so I need to know.
>
> Tomorrow will be exhausting. The crowd today was just a sampling of what's
> to come, snd we're so tired. They follow us home and stay too long. I'm glad
> that he was so loved, but we are wanting peace and time to reflect and just
> be together, our family.
>
> God bless you each and every one,
>
> Giuditta
> (Judy ... Giuditta is the name my Italian grandmother gave me, which
> translates to Judith)
>
>
>
>
>
Judy/G
I am so sorry for your loss, but relieved Don's suffering is over. Be
kind to yourself and be patient with yourself. You've been through a
lot in a short time, and it will take awhile to process it all and
recover. But you are right, Don will always be there with you and you
will feel him there. The plans you have made for his funeral sound
beautiful and a fitting tribute to a wonderful man.
My prayers have been, and will continue to be with you.
Belle

On Apr 29, 10:48 am, "Giuditta" <jma...@myspeedworks.com> wrote:
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
Judy,

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I admire your
strength and hope that when Craigs time comes I have the strength to
get through it. Don is in a much happer place and he will be waiting
for you to come dance with him someday.

(((((((Huge Hugs))))))

Becky

"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:2thZh.58$OR3.476@eagle.america.net...
>
> Thank all of you for your kind words. I do have a big family and feel like
> all of you are now part of it, so you might have to put up with me some.
>
> Again, I can't thank you all enough for the advice, the info, the
> encouragement and the honesty you offered me since November 7.
>
> During Don's last day and night at the hospital, I crawled up in bed
> beside him and hope he knew I was there. It seemed as if he were fighting
> for air, but the nurses gave him meds to help him relax, morphine I
> assume.
>
> I was glad when the room cleared of folks that night, and I finally had
> time alone with him. Both our sons had gigs that they thought they should
> cancel, but I told them their dad would tell them to go play music, so
> they did.
>
> I talked to Don during the night and told him that we would be okay and
> that he could relax and let go. I finally let go as well. I believe he was
> fighting for his life because he knew we needed him.
>
> When he knew it was okay, he finally did let go, and the suffering ended.
> I told him I would love him forever as the kids would also. I told him
> that when I saw the brightest star in the sky that I would know it was
> him, saying that he was okay.
>
> Last night Donnie called me four tmes from his concert and said he knew
> his dad wanted him to play music and be happy, but Donnie told me that he
> felt guilty for trying to act happy while he was playing. I told him about
> the star thing I told Don, and Donnie asked me where this bright star was,
> and he said that he too saw that star and had the same feeling.
>
> Donnie said that he dreamed that Don and his mom were dancing to swing
> music not knowing that she did teach Don the music of that era. Don never
> danced because he was always playing every time we went out, so Donnie was
> shocked when I told him about Don and his mom dancing around their
> house...it was just like his dream.
>
> Also, when I was beside Don in bed, I turned my head and saw a vision of
> Don, standing in the corner of the room with his long hair and jeans on
> and an expression on his face that revealed that he was okay.
>
> I wanted to share this with you all because it was a confirmation that
> there is a destination. Don is now our guardian angel, we know this. He's
> not in pain, not gasping for air, not worrying about anything. You can't
> imagine the peaceful feeling that has blanketed our home.
>
> Sure, I have my low moments because I miss him, but there's a certain
> other feeling that is calming to all of us. The memory of him and his
> brightness will live on forever here.
>
> We're all okay. Maybe it's also all the prayers and good vibes from you
> all, and I thank you again.
>
> I do have a question though. Do I use the Mrs. before my name, or is it
> Ms? I've never been a widoe before, so I need to know.
>
> Tomorrow will be exhausting. The crowd today was just a sampling of what's
> to come, snd we're so tired. They follow us home and stay too long. I'm
> glad that he was so loved, but we are wanting peace and time to reflect
> and just be together, our family.
>
> God bless you each and every one,
>
> Giuditta
> (Judy ... Giuditta is the name my Italian grandmother gave me, which
> translates to Judith)

Dear Giuditta;

Thank you for this amazing and generous post at such a difficult time. You
gave several gifts here - giving Don the affirmation he needed to let go;
the affirmation to your sons to continue living and to honor their father
through their actions; and the gift to us of showing how to be present and
handle all this overwhelming pain with honesty and grace. May the Almighty
be with you as you endure this difficult time.

In my religious tradition, when the designated mourning period is over, we
say - may you know only joy. Not knowing when you will begin your time of
mourning but knowing that when dealing with a terminal illness, we mourn a
little bit all throughout - May loving and happy memories be of comfort when
you are ready for them, and may the future bring you joy when you are ready
to receive it.

Adelle

Giuditta wrote:

>
> I do have a question though. Do I use the Mrs. before my name, or is it Ms?
> I've never been a widoe before, so I need to know.

Use the Mrs. It's perfectly proper.

Janet, typing through tears.


--
Janet Wilder
Bad spelling. Bad punctuation
Good Friends. Good Life

"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net...
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not
> keeping you updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My
> daughter Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I
> glanced at his chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
> The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I
> didn't know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me
> even more proud to have him as a husband and best friend. They
> constantly remarked on his kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now
> they're saying he's in the best band ever, jamming with Harrison,
> Lennon, etc., but I just pray he's able somehow to know how much we
> all love him and always will.
>
> Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all
> arrangements and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't
> think I could have handled all that right now.
>
> I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my
> life. I hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or
> whatever you'd call it in this ng.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow
> the funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's
> life that his sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)
>
Hello Guidetta. I'm so sorry for your loss and so glad that despite
all your fears, frustrations and frets that you were together,
compassionate and totally for Don at the end. The lady who wrote
about the gifts you gave was right. Although life is a precisous
gift, sometimes granting someone the peace to stop is the true gift of
a loving heart.

Peace be with you and your family.

On Apr 30, 2:07 am, "Giuditta" <jma...@myspeedworks.com> wrote:
> I do have a question though. Do I use the Mrs. before my name, or is it Ms?
> I've never been a widoe before, so I need to know.
>
Use whatever you want or nothing at all, Judy. My Aunt identified
herself as Mrs. Robert P. Ford until her death - decades after her
husband's. I just use my first/last name with no embellishment.

It used to be that Mrs. Judy Smith signified divorced while Mrs. Don
Smith married or widowed, but I think that's gone by the boards.
Socks & I had different last names anyway, so I have no idea what one
would do with that.

Fig

Figgertoes <figtoes@yahoo.com> wrote:
>It used to be that Mrs. Judy Smith signified divorced while Mrs. Don
>Smith married or widowed, but I think that's gone by the boards.

It is still in use. Even if she were Mrs. Judy Smith up to now, it
is quite proper to be Mrs. Don Smith from now on.

G, my condolences to you and your family for your loss of Don. And
my admiration for your grace and courage throughout the difficult
times leading up to his passing. We have no doubt he has passed on
to a good place. He lived well and died well.

Cherish those six children and rejoice that you and Don had so many
years together to raise them.

Una

"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net...
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord.
> snipped<
I've been following your threads since I was diagnosed. May the streangth
you've shown so far keep you well in the future.
Much heat felt sympathy for your loss.
Peter

My thoughts are with you and your family Judith. Take comfort in those you
have around you, let the tears fall and hold in your heart all that the two
of you shared together.

*hugs*
Trish

"Trish" <patriciaj@somewhereovertherainbow.com> wrote in
news:wbyZh.17966$_G.10490@edtnps89:

> My thoughts are with you and your family Judith. Take comfort in
> those you have around you, let the tears fall and hold in your heart
> all that the two of you shared together.
>
> *hugs*
> Trish
>
>
Hi, Trish,

Don't remember if you know Judy read Penny's blog cover to cover. It's a
gift Penny gave to the world & to us. Hope you are doing well.

Hugs,
Fig

In article <nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net>,
"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote:

> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
Sorry for the delay in posting. I've been out of touch for the last 2
weeks.

The news of the loss of anyone here is always saddening. Don passed in the
manner that I hope I pass (from the Beast or any other reason) and that is
peacefully.

All possible strength to you and your family and many friends. A few hugs a
day to all too.
--

There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a
suitable application of high explosives.

Bob in Central CA

G:

Let me add my condolences. I pretty much lurk these days. Lost my Dad almost
2 years ago.

I found this group very supportive.

I've been following your saga.

Good luck to you--take care. I know it's hard to let go, but we all have to.

Mel


"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:nf2Zh.46$OR3.564@eagle.america.net...
> Don is in no more pain; he's with the Lord. I'm sorry for not keeping you
> updated the past few days but was by his side 24/7.
>
> He went peacefully just like he always said he wanted to go. My daughter
> Heather and I were chatting at his bedside and suddenly I glanced at his
> chest, and it wasn't moving.
>
> We called the nurse, and she felt for his pulse. There was none.
>
> The whole week was filled with many people coming to see Don, some I
> didn't know, musicians from everywhere. Many loved him and made me even
> more proud to have him as a husband and best friend. They constantly
> remarked on his kindness, gentleness and his aura. Now they're saying he's
> in the best band ever, jamming with Harrison, Lennon, etc., but I just
> pray he's able somehow to know how much we all love him and always will.
>
> Thank God for Mimi and Heather, my daughters. They've made all
> arrangements and all the phone calls to friends, news, etc. I don't think
> I could have handled all that right now.
>
> I thank all of you for helping me get through the hardest time of my life.
> I hope that you won't mind if I still participate, lurk or whatever you'd
> call it in this ng.
>
> Please keep us in your prayers. Today is the visitation and tomorrow the
> funeral, which will be mostly a musical celebration of Don's life that his
> sons will also participate in if they feel able.
>
> Love to you all for your compassion.
> Warm group hug,
> Giuditta
> (Judith)
>

Giuditta: You have had a very big loss right now and are grieving. That is
to be expected. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to experience the
full range of emotions.
Gail
"Giuditta" <jmarrs@myspeedworks.com> wrote in message
news:wT9_h.101$OR3.585@eagle.america.net...
>
> "MZB" <moo@noway.prudigy.net> wrote in message
> news:19VZh.1253$c67.577@newsfe04.lga...
>> G:
>>
>> Let me add my condolences. I pretty much lurk these days. Lost my Dad
>> almost 2 years ago.
>>
>> I found this group very supportive.
>>
>> I've been following your saga.
>>
>> Good luck to you--take care. I know it's hard to let go, but we all have
>> to.
>>
>> Mel
>
>
> <snip>
>
> Thank you, everyone, for your kindness. You're all right about the roller
> coaster ride. I thought, Oh, I can handle this because I have to be strong
> for my kids. ha. what a joke.
>
> I slept with the light on last night, and in the bed but have been flaking
> out on the sofa while my teenager sleeps in his dad's chair.
>
> The kids are hovering like black hawk choppers. Donnie left for a five-day
> gig in TX today, and he's called three times already, and his voice has
> that hurting tone, which wrenches my heart...
>
> I'm so wallowing in self-pity right now, listening to the new CD Don's
> playing drums on and wanting to cry...it's like self-mutillation, but I
> don't care. I might even watch Sleepless in Seattle tonight and cry with
> Tom Hanks.
>
> Don's "Celebration of Life" was such a success that people didn't want to
> leave. Musician friends flew in from all over, and folks were lined up
> outside the door...Don was a humble person, so he was loved by many.
>
> I think most of all he would have been proud of his sons, playing and his
> best friend who wrote a song for him, instrumental acoustic, which he
> calls Don's Song now...it's so beautiful.
>
> Another artist did the Cash song about the circle being unbroken and the
> place rocked out, everyone singing and clapping like an old time gospel
> event at the Lord's Chapel in Nashville...
>
> I might have told y'all this already, but I repeat myself a lot now...this
> very close friend of Don's was there, and as I was leaving, I hugged him,
> surprized that he was there because I knew he was on tour. My reflex was
> to turn around and think that I needed to go tell Don that Joe was
> there...then it struck me like a bolt of