haven't had a day like today in a long, long time

major shut down, can't do anything, everything caving in, wanting to die

"justpackrat" <maddie_75@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1161118106.014189.319250@m73g2000cwd.googlegr oups.com...
> major shut down, can't do anything, everything caving in, wanting to die
>

hang in there hunny.

justpackrat wrote...

> major shut down, can't do anything, everything caving in,
> wanting to die

sorry. it sounds pretty dire. want to talk?

-lisa

justpackrat <maddie_75@yahoo.com> wrote:
> major shut down, can't do anything, everything caving in, wanting to die


yes, I remember that state.

sincerest wishes for your recuperation.

justpackrat <maddie_75@yahoo.com> wrote:
> major shut down, can't do anything, everything caving in, wanting to die

If it's any help, I had some bad days a month or so back,
and the past week or so hasn't been bad. The thoughts
of "I am a complete *****up" and "I have wasted not only
the past decade but the past 10 months" are still there but
don't disable me quite so much.

Anything out of the ordinary (bad weather, physical conditions,
etc) strike lately?

sounds so like much of my feelings about life on and off for the last
several years. I've had a bit of an upswing this past spring and
summer. (Not without their moments, but in comparison, much better).
The last few days, week....but especially today has been rough.
Freezing up completely and I can't explain it. If I had a therapist
where I'm staying at I wouldn't be able to even drag myself there. I
did manage to go out and get some necessities for a few good hours I
had during the evening but panic and that suffocating fog of
helplessness unable to function crept in. If it weren't for my 12 year
old daughter there with me at the store, I think I would have left the
cart and all and just went back home but she got me through it.
Ironic how she's in that pre-teen major attitude stage in life, but
when things are caving in around me, she drops it all and as much as I
hate her having to be the strong one, she's there to help me knowing
how these things hit. Thankfully they aren't as they once were. Last
year this time was extremely rough for all of us. I hope and pray
never to be back there again, but who's to say. I'd lose everything I
have now if I did.

Contrarian wrote:
> justpackrat <maddie_75@yahoo.com> wrote:
> > major shut down, can't do anything, everything caving in, wanting to die
>
> If it's any help, I had some bad days a month or so back,
> and the past week or so hasn't been bad. The thoughts
> of "I am a complete *****up" and "I have wasted not only
> the past decade but the past 10 months" are still there but
> don't disable me quite so much.
>
> Anything out of the ordinary (bad weather, physical conditions,
> etc) strike lately?

"justpackrat" <maddie_75@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1161158882.035658.25990@e3g2000cwe.googlegrou ps.com...
Thankfully they aren't as they once were. Last
| year this time was extremely rough for all of us. I hope and pray
| never to be back there again, but who's to say. I'd lose everything I
| have now if I did.



Keep on fighting the fight JPR, I draw on the past now, rather than dwell
on it like I used to, it helps remind me of where I came from, and of what
I am today!