A Flashback to Neil's FFID Days

I stumbled across this posting I made during my FFID days. It was
posted to rec.games.chess.politics in January 2002. I was well over 300
pounds, probably, at the time it was posted - my last scale reading was
317 in June of 2000. I'm currently more than 40 pounds below that.

The poster, "Eric M", was trying to encourage me to lose weight. I
communicate with him, and now, five years later, I'm encouraging him.
Unfortunately Tom Klem, also mentioned in the post, died earlier this
year, still morbidly obese.

I find the posting amusing because it shows how casual I was about
weight loss - just cut some carbs and be done. That's pretty much how a
FFID thinks when they "try" to lose weight. Oh, I'll just eat light.
I'll just switch to diet soda. I'll "try" to cut carbs. All that does
is apply a bandage to your thinking, so you can get on with the rest of
your FFID lifestyle. The only exercise I was getting was taking clothes
to the laundramat and walking four blocks to the sub shop to get an
enormous sub with cheese fries.

I've added brackets with explanations of chess politics references, and
deleted some references to chess newsgroup disputes of five years ago.
The comments about my not existing were prompted by netkook Sam Sloan's
insistence that I wasn't a real person and because he never saw me I
never visited a certain chess tournament.

Enjoy!

Neil, former FFID
385/275/220

> PRECIOUS LITTLE CHESS CONTENT
> Weighty matters are afoot here.
> Both Tom Klem and Neil Brennen, who I'm sure I won't see at the LBO [Liberty Bell Open],
> even if he is there, have recently posted their weight as 300 pounds.
> Extra marks for honesty, gentlemen.

Well, that was a round figure. A VERY round figure. It's at least as
accurate as [former USCF President] Tim Redman's comments on USCF
finances.

> This strikes home for me because my scale has recently started to
> malfunction, and it is apparently trying to tell me that, for the first
> time in my life, I have reached 260 LBS. Christmas cookies were awfully
> tasty this year.
> Damn pants have shrunk, too. I never was much good at laundry.

If you return to school, you could get a doctorate in Laundry, and
then call yourself Dr. on the newsgroup.

Next size

> up means I'll have to go back to the Big&Fat section again.
> BTW, I am 37 years old, 6'2" in really thick socks, with a medium-large
> frame.

SWM, 36, 6'1 (without thick socks), medium large frame. Idea of a good
time is to go to a library and copy chess columns from microfilm. Fond
of the King's Gambit, French Defense....PSCF, writing, and
newsgroups....

I can take a lot of weight,-I used to fluctuate from about 225 to

> 240, which was a few pounds too much, but not all that bad-, but now
> I've clearly got to reduce my flabbage.
> Of course, I have all manner of excuses for this unwelcome expansion:
> it's been a tough year, I quit smoking,

Congratulations!

(nothing vulgar like cigarettes

> or dope, just good cigars and pipes, as befits a man of stature and
> contemplative nature approaching middle age), I switched jobs to a
> cubicle in an airless office, my father was sick for awhile, yada yada.
> Also, maybe I ate a bit too much....
> Anyone want to join me in my New Year's resolution to shed three stone?
> We could form a cyber-club.

Agreed.

> Post your weight, age, height, BMI, frame-size, and what you plan to do
> to shrink next year. (Please insert appropriate B&E cheap shot here.)

I've already posted it above. After consulting a physician, I was
advised restricting carbohydrates is the best approach. I've been
trying it for a month, but I've cheated too frequently.

> I'm going to buy a box of cigars,-yes, not a good tradeoff, I know-,
> take at least one long, brisk walk per day, without exception, eliminate
> all fast food, beer, and most desserts, limit my intake to two helpings,
> rather than three, swill plenty of strong black coffee, and play lots of
> chess. Might work.
> Overweightness and chess make a natural match, of course. It could even
> be argued that flab was responsible for the ultimate passage of OMOV.
> Remember in 1999, Sam Sloan posted photos of all the Terrie-tablers in
> Kona, with instructions to generally harass these people, and ban them
> from your tournaments. He somehow doctored these photos to make most of
> those beach-loving give-a-shitters look downright fat.
> We don't want that cruel fate to befall us.

Well, if Sam Sloan photographs me, then I guess it is proof I exist.
Also proof I was at a Goichberg tournament.

> Serious disclaimer: obviously, I don't mean to make light of what is a
> serious health and/or psychological well-being issue for many people.
> Good luck to you, if that's your situation. It can be done; I've seen
> it.
> But for those of us who are just lazy and like to eat a lot, a
> cyber-club could be just the meal ticket. So to speak. Anyone who feels
> slighted for not making it onto the frequent posters rating list now has
> a chance to fit in.
> We can occasionally meet for in-person support at some of the big
> tournaments, too.
> First meeting at the Wendy's next to the Parsippany Hilton, 45 minutes
> prior to round one of the USATE. We'll share a grilled chicken salad.
> LIte Italian dressing on the side.
> Any takers?
> Yours in gluttony,
> Eric M

How about at the Liberty Bell Open instead? That way, you could serve
as witness that I was at a Goichberg tournament. Perhaps we should
invite Sam Sloan? He looked like he had put on some weight when I saw
him at the World Open.

Neil