OT: Help for partner???

Hi everyone,

I've been going out with the most wonderful woman for 10 months now. At
the moment it's a long distance relationship for at least maybe another
six months.

About 6 weeks ago she started the major physical signs of menopause. The
more I read now the more I wish I could have seen it coming.

My question is: I've found a few websites with advice for partners and I
am being as supportive as I can, listening, giving space when I think
she needs it, daily reminding her through email and txt messages how
much I love her and how much I look forward to our future together,
sending her music and books. Etc.

Still feeling pretty helpless.

Is there anything else I can do or that you can suggest? Websites I may
have missed?

I looked at alt.support.menopause.husbands but it was all but empty.

All advice and suggestions gratefully accepted.

Cheers

Paul

On Mar 16, 10:10 am, MacMan <funs...@bigpond.net.au.spamfoil> wrote:
> Hi everyone,
>
> I've been going out with the most wonderful woman for 10 months now. At
> the moment it's a long distance relationship for at least maybe another
> six months.
>
> About 6 weeks ago she started the major physical signs of menopause. The
> more I read now the more I wish I could have seen it coming.
>
> My question is: I've found a few websites with advice for partners and I
> am being as supportive as I can, listening, giving space when I think
> she needs it, daily reminding her through email and txt messages how
> much I love her and how much I look forward to our future together,
> sending her music and books. Etc.
>
> Still feeling pretty helpless.
>
> Is there anything else I can do or that you can suggest? Websites I may
> have missed?
>
> I looked at alt.support.menopause.husbands but it was all but empty.
>
> All advice and suggestions gratefully accepted.
>
> Cheers
>
> Paul

Others, with a lot more experience than I, will no doubt give you some
great advice. I have had very little in the way of symptoms -- just
some fast and furious hot flashes for about 6 weeks and then they were
gone. No mood swings, which I guess is the major challenge for both a
woman and her partner.

I'm just chiming in here to give you encouragement and to tell you
what a great guy you are. Good for you!

JustGB

In article <funster-B5005E.19100316032007@news-server.bigpond.net.au>,
MacMan <funster@bigpond.net.au.spamfoil> wrote:

> Hi everyone,

Hello, Paul.

> I've been going out with the most wonderful woman for 10 months now. At
> the moment it's a long distance relationship for at least maybe another
> six months.
>
> About 6 weeks ago she started the major physical signs of menopause.

Such as?

> The
> more I read now the more I wish I could have seen it coming.

Every woman's experience can be different. You can't assume anything
about one woman's experience based on what you've read. And what would
you have done if you'd "seen it coming?"

> My question is: I've found a few websites with advice for partners and I
> am being as supportive as I can, listening, giving space when I think
> she needs it,

Is that the same as when she says she needs it?

> daily reminding her through email and txt messages how
> much I love her and how much I look forward to our future together,
> sending her music and books. Etc.

I hope these aren't new features of your relationship.

> Still feeling pretty helpless.

OK.

> Is there anything else I can do or that you can suggest? Websites I may
> have missed?

Have you asked her what she would like you to do or to know? A bunch of
strangers aren't going to know more clearly than her what her needs are.

> I looked at alt.support.menopause.husbands but it was all but empty.

Yeah, it's too bad, but it hasn't really been active.

> All advice and suggestions gratefully accepted.

OK.

1. Forgive any mixed reactions (or outright negative reactions) you
might get here. There have, unfortunately, been a few men who've posted
here wanting to know how to fix their wives so they'll start giving them
sex again and/or otherwise go back to being compliant submissive
servants.

2. Ask her what she needs, what she wants.

3. Keep crisp boundaries -- it's not about you.

4. Keep posting.

Despite my brusk tone, I do wish you well and hope you're one of the
good guys.

Priscilla

On Fri, 16 Mar 2007 08:10:03 GMT, MacMan
<funster@bigpond.net.au.spamfoil> wrote:

>Is there anything else I can do or that you can suggest?

Wow, do you have a brother?


Sounds like you are doing all the right things so far.



Dana
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons,
for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

"MacMan" <funster@bigpond.net.au.spamfoil> wrote in message
news:funster-B5005E.19100316032007@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
> Hi everyone,
>
> I've been going out with the most wonderful woman for 10 months now. At
> the moment it's a long distance relationship for at least maybe another
> six months.
>
> About 6 weeks ago she started the major physical signs of menopause.

Tell her about this newsgroup.