OT - simple home remedies

From another newsgroup - merely for men I guess ;o)))

1. IF YOU'RE CHOKING ON AN ICE CUBE, SIMPLY POUR A CUP OF BOILING
WATER DOWN YOUR THROAT. PRESTO! THE BLOCKAGE WILL INSTANTLY REMOVE
ITSELF.

2. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES
BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES
WHILE YOU CHOP.

3. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY
USING THE SINK.

4. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED
FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER
TO USE A TIMER.

5. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU
FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE
BUTTON.

6. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF
LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

7. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT
DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES,
USE THE DUCT TAPE.

8. REMEMBER - EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.

9. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL
PROBLEM.
--
A man’s worst difficulties begin when he is able to do as he
likes. Thomas Henry Huxley

On Jan 23, 5:31 pm, Tonnie <tonn...@NOgmail.com> wrote:
> From another newsgroup - merely for men I guess ;o)))
>
> 1. IF YOU'RE CHOKING ON AN ICE CUBE, SIMPLY POUR A CUP OF BOILING
> WATER DOWN YOUR THROAT. PRESTO! THE BLOCKAGE WILL INSTANTLY REMOVE
> ITSELF.
>
> 2. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES
> BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES
> WHILE YOU CHOP.
>
> 3. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY
> USING THE SINK.
>
> 4. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED
> FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER
> TO USE A TIMER.
>
> 5. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU
> FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE
> BUTTON.
>
> 6. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF
> LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
>
> 7. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT
> DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES,
> USE THE DUCT TAPE.
>
> 8. REMEMBER - EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.
>
> 9. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL
> PROBLEM.
> --
> A man's worst difficulties begin when he is able to do as he
> likes. Thomas Henry Huxley

love this - especially the wd-40/duct tape & hammer/electrical.