gimcrack in peace hopes forever

I am easly excited, to excite out of excite like gekoo, a stupidity
without any purpose look for excitement. Was that paranoia a real? I
ask myself.
It's not even having a schizophrenia, was I that paranoid a real? I
ask myself.
I must had been a too much of the time to be so. I won't help a thing
but a confusion.

It got me realize I have that mark and isolate myself to survive
inspite of that element making myself thrown back to the own world
because of that charactor. Now I am well aware of that part that I
try to hide to a higher place and looking down the nervesness over
what to say or to communicate that I was too higher up and looking
down of a kind and I am trying to be very naturaly peaceful person.
And when I have found the person who has a beautiful soul so
attentative and listen and share the common subjects and being with
the person knowing that persons joyful when share the common subjects
like a personality saving a soul.,, it's alright to act like a stupid
when meet a straingers, without being no nervas, I can act normal, be
attentative. It seem that I had been excited over wrong people for
too long in life without close look what to create at a life
experiences. When meet hard working a family loving person with a
beautiful soul who has no edges plus attentative and share common
subjects, it's a lasting save soul from all that blindness. I am not
excited over this, I am very peaceful and it lasting my soul at
peace. It's mostly that I found the old aging. I wish I was that old
when I was at young age. I am very glad that I am meeting such a
persons and spend time togather for some weeks making a memory to be
the being of intelligent down to earth. More i try to explain more i
become lost in excitement, maybe I have no idea what to explain
certain one thing but try so hard to connects, I simply be quietly
solve the psychoses quietly may work or talk to soneone who has been
in the process. Things that no one tell you when you are all that
giekoo.
I am learning so much of a relationships by having my own exhibition.