5 yrs. - I Believe - Repost

Now, it seemed, I was in a world of make believe. I continued to shake my
head and think, who would have ever thought. Certainly not me. It's
probably why I still celebrate every year, this journey is so amazing.. and
now beginning to be very real. This was my 5th year post.

PatB



I Believe

My Quit Family, the 5/25'ers and I have had emails flying between us in the
last few days. It seems we have now acquired a new title, Olympian Old
Fogey. Yup... the guys, Selma and I have reached 5 years of smoke freedom.
Can you believe that? If this is a dream, pinch me and wake me up 'cause I
don't wanna miss the party!

I am Yukpa hashi. I have been a part of AS3 for 5 years. This group gave
me my quit family. This group gave me my quit coach, ddsteve and Cog
Quitting. I found so many friends here. Besides my quit family and Steve,
there's ddJacquie, Mona, Slackr, Miss Maggie, my own Melly, well... I know I
am bound to leave someone out so I'll quit there but know this... many of
you, whether you know it or not, played a part in my quit. I would learn
something every time I read a post that shared what was working for you.
Thank you for that. This group stood beside me through some of the most
intense times of my life. This group... Well, let me say, I'm grateful,
deep inside grateful for all of you.

I also wanted to share this milestone with you because I wanted a chance to
say... I truly believe that no matter what you might face in the first year
of this incredible ride, you CAN get to where I am. I just know it.

5 years and 1 day ago, I was just sure I would go to my grave a smoker. You
could not have convinced me that I would be able to stay quit past a day..
maybe two but no more. I have quit so many times, it is a number without
knowing but I wanted, needed to try one more time. My chest really hurt. I
already had many smoking related symptoms including shortness of breath and
a cough that brought up such gunk, the memory of which still brings on the
shudders. My grandsons would turn their face away when I tried to smooch
them because I really smelled. And that hurt. I knew my life was not my
own when the day came where I drove to the drive up window at the smoke shop
in my robe and slippers because I ran out of smokes. I didn't even take the
time to get dressed!!! How sad is that? I couldn't enjoy a movie, a
meal, a long conversation without what felt like a vice squeezing my chest
because I needed a hit of nicotine. My whole life, it seemed, wound around
my need for that drug. I had had enough, 5 years ago, and then I found this
newsgroup. And the journey began that brought me to here.

There are many things I did in the beginning to help myself get smoke free.
But the most important thing I learned was Cog Quitting
(www.cognitivequitting.com). Learning this method is the reason I have quit
comfort to this day. And because of this method, in time, I no longer felt
the desire or had a fear that I would go back to smoking. Talk about
true freedom. I also had mantras, if you will, that essentially said,
smoking is not an option for me. Not one puff, no matter what. And then it
was up to me to honor it. And... I stayed close to AS3. I wrote a lot,
walked a lot, did whatever it took to get free.

The benefits that I enjoy are incredible. The health reasons have fallen
away. I just had a chest X-ray that was so clean, the doctor was amazed to
find out I had smoked for most of my life. (I breathed such a huge sigh
after he said that. I think as an ex-smoker, I won't ever get past the
thought of possible damage though. But for now, this was excellent
news.

My grandsons continue to celebrate the milestones with me. It's not month
by month, of course, but I will get a phone call tonight, of that I am sure.
I love going to the movies with them and settling down with a bunch of
popcorn and a big jug of Sprite and totally enjoy the movie. I have more
energy too!

I can sit with my dinner companions and not have a take a break to step
outside 'cause my chest was so tight, I couldn't think of anything else but
a smoke.

This journey was not easy. I had a very serious case of quit depression. It
took me a long time to find my balance. But I did.

I was blessed to have folks from this newsgroup who listened to this quitter
no matter what. I was one who whined and bellyached and generally made a
nuisance of myself.


But step by step, day by day, week by week, month by month and now year by
year, I have walked the walk to Olympian Old Fogie.

I have written so many words over the years, I wasn't sure I had much more
to say today. But if you've forged ahead and gotten this far, I want to
leave you with one last thought. I truly believe that quitting cigs *is*
possible. Every quit is different so you must find what works for you, but
if you continue to press forward, keep working the quit, you will make it
happen. Absolutely.

This is what I'm celebrating today:

Five years, 0 minutes and 12 seconds. 54780 cigarettes not smoked, saving
$11,092.95. Life saved: 27 weeks, 1 day, 5 hours, 0 minutes.

Looking at that I must say I *finally* believe I have made it to 5 years of
smoke freedom, to my OOFdom. Oh my...

Still walking the walk but with a skip in my step today,
Pat/Yukpa hashi/Laughing Moon/OOF