Back to HOF Again

Morning folks! Well, I hit HOF last night at 10:30pm. I wasn't
around here to celebrate it with you as Ric & I were having dinner at
his place and I didn't get back until late, and I felt too tired to
say boo about it then.

Well, I'm up and wordy about and as usual. HOF is a great place for
me to be. My quit really feels solid this time and I have been very
blessed that I have yet to have a real moment of doubt where nicodemon
got the upper hand. But I am vigilant. This is not the first time I
have gotten to HOF. I think this is the third time and I plan on this
being the last time that I have to write this. I did learn more about
myself with each quit and especially with the eventual failure where
the 'just one' BS finally got to me and I screwed up and smoked. I'm
not the sort of person to be able to pick myself up and re-start the
quit. No. I have to sit in smoke for some period of time before I
finally get pissed enough at that situation to finally make up my mind
to do another quit. I'm tired of that. I'm tired of looking in the
mirror and saying 'you failed again' to myself. It is one hell of a
lot sweeter to look in the mirror and say to myself 'you won one again
for yet another day'. And that is what quitting is. Not picking up
the next sickerette. That challenge is with us everyday whether we
actively think about smoking or not. Learning to admit I am powerless
over nicotine addiction is probably one of the hardest realizations I
have ever faced. But I am here and very glad to be here. That I can
write this 6 months after my first post here gives me pride and
encouragement that I will make it yet another day.

So, to all of you in AS3Land. THANK YOU! Thank you for all the hugs
you have sent me as I've posted. Thank you for sharing each and every
trial and tribulation that you have faced during this time. We all do
learn from each other and the support we give each other is certainly
part of the 'higher power' than does relieve our addiction.

Stay on course and keep focused. We all win this together and I am
damn glad to be a part of this wonderful community.

With Gratitude
FlatironMike
Six months, 12 hours, 20 minutes and 37 seconds. 3630 cigarettes not
smoked, saving $1,088.83. Life saved: 1 week, 5 days, 14 hours, 30
minutes.