Dear Jef....

Yes, I know you said "goodbye", but I'm not sure what that means.
<Envisioning the eye rolling going on> You may have kill filed me.
You may have just decided to no longer read my posts. You may just
mean you're not dealing with "the issue" any longer. Since there's an
excellent possibility that you won't read this I'm figuring that one
of your friends will apprise you of the content. If not, it just
doesn't matter. I'm writing this for me. Whoopee.
First of all, please take the hex off of my computer. Yes, I know you
did it. I just know. I can't download any new messages, but I can,
based on another NG, post. Imagine my frustration this morning when I
realized you've deviously screwed with my Usenet. (Yes, I'm kidding.
It's happened before with Earthlink).
I read your reply to my last post on Google. Ewwww. I believe that
at one time I set myself up to post there but I don't remember my pass
word so I'm stuck doing this. I read your reply this morning and
don't really feel like fussing around finding it again. So, please
excuse any inaccuracy (which you will, I'm sure, be quick to point
out).
When I said, "Jef, I'm happy that you have lots of money and lots of
time to do what you want. That's wonderful. I don't..." you shot
back (in high dudgeon it seemed to me) with the fact that I know
nothing about you. Well, you're right. I assumed that you had enough
money to go to various meets. OK, let me rephrase that. "Jef, I'm
happy that you have enough money or credit or friends willing to pay
your way, or freebies on plains, trains and hotels....". That ought
to cover that.
Now, after excoriating *me* for making assumptions about you you
proceeded to give me a $2 psych evaluation (paranoia - very nice). How
is it that you know enough about me to do this? Please let me know
right away if you have a degree in psychology, preferably advanced,
or, better yet a doctorate in psychiatry. If any of this is the case
I need to know so that I can copy off your evaluation, take it to
Social Security and retire on disability. I'm sure they'll take your
word for it.
You suggested that I might want to kill file you. Well, I can't do
that unless you remove the hex. Alas, Google doesn't have a killfile.
Not that I know of. Anyway, as 4th assistant to the 3rd
undersecretary to the 2nd vice-president of your fan club why ever
would I want to do that? OK. I probably would right now on a
temporary basis just to be over and done with this. I love your
writing. Well, not the excoriating (will that pass the spell check?)
ones, but I'm sure the other fan club members have thoroughly enjoyed
your scathing replies to me. Actually, even though I've been the
subject (my own doing) I'd still give ya a 9.5. I'd give ya a 9.7 if
you'd called me a bitch and a perfect 10 if you'd called me a fucking
bitch. Maybe next time, huh?
Onward. You made mention of the fact that you thought I was pretty
laid back. Ha! And you thought you knew me well enough for the
evaluation. Actually, on Usenet I generally am. In RL I've got a
nasty, rotten flashfire temper. You said something about you being
socially inept (I don't remember if this is still the case or if
you've gotten over it). Please, Jef. Compared to me you're Mr
Congeniality and the most popular boy in the class. Anyway, here's
the thing. I started taking this news group too seriously - I've
gotten waaay too involved. Last night I didn't sleep too well until I
had an epiphany about, oh, 2 am. At that point I remembered.....

<drum roll>


<trumpet flourish>



THIS IS USENET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(at which point I went right to sleep)


There is little chance I will ever meet anyone here (I've cancelled
our reservations at Pea Soup Andersen's now that I know you won't be
coming). There are maybe 5 people on this NG whom I would feel
comfortable meeting (surprise!! You aren't one of them - certainly
not now - I know you're upset about this). (If you ever have another
"general" meet I promise I won't come even if invited - fat chance -
LOL - I can see it now - "we're having a meet in Buttfuck MO and
everyone is invited except Sue"). So, as much as I do like most
people here I recognize what this is for me.
Now, I should do the "right" thing and bid you all a fond adieu. Nope.
Not gonna happen. Sorry. If you take the hex off of my computer I
will continue to post - a bit. Expecting no responses, of course,
being the pariah that I now am (I did it up well, don't I?). But, I
post for my pleasure. I don't believe you can stop me from doing
this. (joking again)
I'm truly sorry that I had such an old and small picture on the
picture sight. I'm sure you would come up with something incredibly
witty to make of me. If I had something better I'd send it to you.
Now I'm off the Sportsman's club where they shoot guns and there are
ash trays (which I don't need) on the tables.
Oh, and since I've probably offended 95% of this NG for insulting the
favorite son (were you *my* son you'd be at least 2nd favorite) here's
my greatest sin of all in case you missed it - I love Wal*Mart. I
love it, love it, love it. I shop there at least once a week. I'm
unrepentant!!!! Hallelujah brothers and sisters!!
Damn, I enjoyed writing this post. Thanks!!!
So, dear Jef, ttfn. Keep fighting the good fight. Keep making us
laugh. You're a sweetheart - really - even I think so.
Sue - 1st class, A1, Genuine, Double Rectified, USDA Prime Grade,
non-smoking Bitch!