First Social Gathering Today

It was TERRIFYING before I got there.......ok in the
beginning........but then the memories came flooding in my
mind,,,....and with THAT........THAT FUCKING HABIT....THE REMEMBRANCE
of that habit followed, now here's a possible craving in the
making......I was hurting inside (emotionally)

I went and grabbed a beer (Uh Oh...that was a No No for me....I told
myself just water or soda - NO BEER !!!)
SO...there i was, cracking open a beer (I will not make light of this
for myself....cuz if i did...then a 2nd beer....then beer at
home....then.....possibly stronger stuff....even if not....beer at
home ALWAYS carried with it smoking..........like salt and
pepper.......ketchup and musturd...frik and frak..

so...Darlene walked by, and (she did not know of my preference to curb
my drinking) she held out a bottle of water..I put the beer down and
drank the water for the remainder of the afternoon.

No cigs...even though somebodys Camels were sitting on the next table
- it didnt disturb me...no not today.
Still smokeless...but felt like I was walking too close to the edge
for MY sake anyway.

1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
thereof about.
fact is........i didnt smoke.


Steve
Two weeks, one day, 3 hours, 17 minutes and 24 seconds. 378 cigarettes
not smoked, saving $60.55. Life saved: 1 day, 7 hours, 30 minutes.

you keep winning the battles and before you know it you've won the war!

best wishes
richard

"SilentNight" <M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1183327729.768567.111250@57g2000hsv.googlegro ups.com...
> It was TERRIFYING before I got there.......ok in the
> beginning........but then the memories came flooding in my
> mind,,,....and with THAT........THAT FUCKING HABIT....THE REMEMBRANCE
> of that habit followed, now here's a possible craving in the
> making......I was hurting inside (emotionally)
>
> I went and grabbed a beer (Uh Oh...that was a No No for me....I told
> myself just water or soda - NO BEER !!!)
> SO...there i was, cracking open a beer (I will not make light of this
> for myself....cuz if i did...then a 2nd beer....then beer at
> home....then.....possibly stronger stuff....even if not....beer at
> home ALWAYS carried with it smoking..........like salt and
> pepper.......ketchup and musturd...frik and frak..
>
> so...Darlene walked by, and (she did not know of my preference to curb
> my drinking) she held out a bottle of water..I put the beer down and
> drank the water for the remainder of the afternoon.
>
> No cigs...even though somebodys Camels were sitting on the next table
> - it didnt disturb me...no not today.
> Still smokeless...but felt like I was walking too close to the edge
> for MY sake anyway.
>
> 1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
> somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
> Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
> wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
> thereof about.
> fact is........i didnt smoke.
>
>
> Steve
> Two weeks, one day, 3 hours, 17 minutes and 24 seconds. 378 cigarettes
> not smoked, saving $60.55. Life saved: 1 day, 7 hours, 30 minutes.
>

Sheesh Steve! You didn't even give Darlene a kiss?

Oh baby...

:-p~~~~~~~ Keven OOF
Don't ever forget why you quit.



"SilentNight" <M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1183327729.768567.111250@57g2000hsv.googlegro ups.com...
> It was TERRIFYING before I got there.......ok in the
> beginning........but then the memories came flooding in my
> mind,,,....and with THAT........THAT FUCKING HABIT....THE REMEMBRANCE
> of that habit followed, now here's a possible craving in the
> making......I was hurting inside (emotionally)
>
> I went and grabbed a beer (Uh Oh...that was a No No for me....I told
> myself just water or soda - NO BEER !!!)
> SO...there i was, cracking open a beer (I will not make light of this
> for myself....cuz if i did...then a 2nd beer....then beer at
> home....then.....possibly stronger stuff....even if not....beer at
> home ALWAYS carried with it smoking..........like salt and
> pepper.......ketchup and musturd...frik and frak..
>
> so...Darlene walked by, and (she did not know of my preference to curb
> my drinking) she held out a bottle of water..I put the beer down and
> drank the water for the remainder of the afternoon.
>
> No cigs...even though somebodys Camels were sitting on the next table
> - it didnt disturb me...no not today.
> Still smokeless...but felt like I was walking too close to the edge
> for MY sake anyway.
>
> 1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
> somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
> Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
> wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
> thereof about.
> fact is........i didnt smoke.
>
>
> Steve
> Two weeks, one day, 3 hours, 17 minutes and 24 seconds. 378 cigarettes
> not smoked, saving $60.55. Life saved: 1 day, 7 hours, 30 minutes.
>

On Sun, 01 Jul 2007 15:08:49 -0700, SilentNight
<M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote:

>It was TERRIFYING before I got there.......ok in the
>beginning........but then the memories came flooding in my
>mind,,,....and with THAT........THAT FUCKING HABIT....THE REMEMBRANCE
>of that habit followed, now here's a possible craving in the
>making......I was hurting inside (emotionally)
>
>I went and grabbed a beer (Uh Oh...that was a No No for me....I told
>myself just water or soda - NO BEER !!!)
>SO...there i was, cracking open a beer (I will not make light of this
>for myself....cuz if i did...then a 2nd beer....then beer at
>home....then.....possibly stronger stuff....even if not....beer at
>home ALWAYS carried with it smoking..........like salt and
>pepper.......ketchup and musturd...frik and frak..
>
>so...Darlene walked by, and (she did not know of my preference to curb
>my drinking) she held out a bottle of water..I put the beer down and
>drank the water for the remainder of the afternoon.
>
>No cigs...even though somebodys Camels were sitting on the next table
>- it didnt disturb me...no not today.
>Still smokeless...but felt like I was walking too close to the edge
>for MY sake anyway.
>
>1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
>somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
>Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
>wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
>thereof about.
>fact is........i didnt smoke.
>
>
>Steve
>Two weeks, one day, 3 hours, 17 minutes and 24 seconds. 378 cigarettes
>not smoked, saving $60.55. Life saved: 1 day, 7 hours, 30 minutes.

Good for you. You've passed a major test. There will be many more
but this was the most important and probably the hardest.
Sue

Agreed. Social gatherings have been very hard for me. It's only been
this last week that I felt "on top of it" enough NOT to smoke if
someone there was smoking. Luckily the boyfriend and best friend don't
smoke (he never did, she quit) so it doesn't come up that often.

I am very proud of you Steve. No need to analyze ... just be proud of
yourself. You're right, you didn't smoke, and that's the important
thing...

Ashley

Good job getting thru without smoking.also good for switching to water from
beer.
becky
Four weeks, 21 hours, 25 minutes and 15 seconds. 1444 cigarettes not smoked,
saving $134.35. Life saved: 5 days, 20 minutes.

"SilentNight" <M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1183327729.768567.111250@57g2000hsv.googlegro ups.com...
> It was TERRIFYING before I got there.......ok in the
> beginning........but then the memories came flooding in my
> mind,,,....and with THAT........THAT FUCKING HABIT....THE REMEMBRANCE
> of that habit followed, now here's a possible craving in the
> making......I was hurting inside (emotionally)
>
> I went and grabbed a beer (Uh Oh...that was a No No for me....I told
> myself just water or soda - NO BEER !!!)
> SO...there i was, cracking open a beer (I will not make light of this
> for myself....cuz if i did...then a 2nd beer....then beer at
> home....then.....possibly stronger stuff....even if not....beer at
> home ALWAYS carried with it smoking..........like salt and
> pepper.......ketchup and musturd...frik and frak..
>
> so...Darlene walked by, and (she did not know of my preference to curb
> my drinking) she held out a bottle of water..I put the beer down and
> drank the water for the remainder of the afternoon.
>
> No cigs...even though somebodys Camels were sitting on the next table
> - it didnt disturb me...no not today.
> Still smokeless...but felt like I was walking too close to the edge
> for MY sake anyway.
>
> 1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
> somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
> Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
> wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
> thereof about.
> fact is........i didnt smoke.
>
>
> Steve
> Two weeks, one day, 3 hours, 17 minutes and 24 seconds. 378 cigarettes
> not smoked, saving $60.55. Life saved: 1 day, 7 hours, 30 minutes.
>

"SilentNight" <M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1183327729.768567.111250@57g2000hsv.googlegro ups.com...
> It was TERRIFYING before I got there.......ok in the
> beginning........but then the memories came flooding in my
> mind,,,....and with THAT........THAT FUCKING HABIT....THE REMEMBRANCE
> of that habit followed, now here's a possible craving in the
> making......I was hurting inside (emotionally)
>
> I went and grabbed a beer (Uh Oh...that was a No No for me....I told
> myself just water or soda - NO BEER !!!)
> SO...there i was, cracking open a beer (I will not make light of this
> for myself....cuz if i did...then a 2nd beer....then beer at
> home....then.....possibly stronger stuff....even if not....beer at
> home ALWAYS carried with it smoking..........like salt and
> pepper.......ketchup and musturd...frik and frak..
>
> so...Darlene walked by, and (she did not know of my preference to curb
> my drinking) she held out a bottle of water..I put the beer down and
> drank the water for the remainder of the afternoon.
>
> No cigs...even though somebodys Camels were sitting on the next table
> - it didnt disturb me...no not today.
> Still smokeless...but felt like I was walking too close to the edge
> for MY sake anyway.
>
> 1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
> somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
> Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
> wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
> thereof about.
> fact is........i didnt smoke.
>
>
> Steve
> Two weeks, one day, 3 hours, 17 minutes and 24 seconds. 378 cigarettes
> not smoked, saving $60.55. Life saved: 1 day, 7 hours, 30 minutes.
>

I know what you mean by mixed emotions but the fact is you did it, be proud.
Baby steps.

GregB
7 years + some
--
Epitaph - I'll try harder next time.

On 1 Jul, 23:08, SilentNight <M.Better...@gmail.com> wrote:
> It was TERRIFYING before I got there.......ok in the
> beginning........but then the memories came flooding in my
> mind,,,....and with THAT........THAT FUCKING HABIT....THE REMEMBRANCE
> of that habit followed, now here's a possible craving in the
> making......I was hurting inside (emotionally)
>
> I went and grabbed a beer (Uh Oh...that was a No No for me....I told
> myself just water or soda - NO BEER !!!)
> SO...there i was, cracking open a beer (I will not make light of this
> for myself....cuz if i did...then a 2nd beer....then beer at
> home....then.....possibly stronger stuff....even if not....beer at
> home ALWAYS carried with it smoking..........like salt and
> pepper.......ketchup and musturd...frik and frak..
>
> so...Darlene walked by, and (she did not know of my preference to curb
> my drinking) she held out a bottle of water..I put the beer down and
> drank the water for the remainder of the afternoon.
>
> No cigs...even though somebodys Camels were sitting on the next table
> - it didnt disturb me...no not today.
> Still smokeless...but felt like I was walking too close to the edge
> for MY sake anyway.
>
> 1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
> somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
> Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
> wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
> thereof about.
> fact is........i didnt smoke.
>
> Steve
> Two weeks, one day, 3 hours, 17 minutes and 24 seconds. 378 cigarettes
> not smoked, saving $60.55. Life saved: 1 day, 7 hours, 30 minutes.

Nice one !! Well done !!
Regards Chris

SilentNight <M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote:

>1st Social gathering was the hardest - even though this was at
>somebodys home - patio. I made it through.
>Dont know how i feel. Mixed emotions right now.......and Im fucking
>wearied too much to analyze why I have mixed emotions...or lack
>thereof about.
>fact is........i didnt smoke.

That's all that matters! You did not smoke now and you will not smoke
in the future, it only gets easier!

--
Tihomir
*I don't smoke anymore*

.... File not found, I'll load something *I* think is interesting.
This signature was made by SigChanger.
You can find SigChanger at: http://www.phranc.nl/

Steve! Ya did good and that is what matters. Recognizing that beer
is a trigger and taking action to avoid it is how to keep on keeping
on. There is no way to avoid smokers no matter where we live [unless
we live on top of a very isolated mountain] so we do have to learn to
go on about our lives and not let *them* fuck up our quit! Keep on
keeping on and those 15 days look great on you!

FlatironMike
FSS
1/3 OF

Silent Night,

Great. Or Awesome as my American friends like to say it. WOW.

Glad you kept away from both the evils. When I stopped smoking two
years back, I also quit drinking. Buy one, get one free as the advt
campaigns go.

I lost weight, slept well, and felt better in both the alimentary and
pulmonary departments.

Vikrant Patel

Thanks Everyone - Its a ROLLERCOASTER FUCKING RIDE...
Ya know...you can be feeling good one moment...I mean, just going for
a walk, and feeling like you're getting your life in control...feeling
a sort of POWER with that...this gives you HOPE, feeling good about
it...then...outta the fucking blue...PLUMMET into fucking depression,
cant keep your eyes open...falling asleep...feeling like shit
basically....(not so much physically, but mentally and emotionally)

Silent

Two weeks, two days, 59 minutes and 35 seconds. 401 cigarettes not
smoked, saving $64.16. Life saved: 1 day, 9 hours, 25 minutes.

Yes, Steve, you are at the stage in the quit where everything feels
like you're walking on Jello and can't get a real footing. Relax, it
will even out in the long run. Soon you will look back on this part
of the quit with a smile realizing you licked it. Hang Tuff! Don't
Puff

FlatironMike
FSS
Four months, three weeks, 17 hours, 52 minutes and 59 seconds. 2834
cigarettes not smoked, saving $850.22. Life saved: 1 week, 2 days, 20
hours, 10 minutes.