Just checking in

saying hello to all my friends.
I miss all of you - thinking of you.
Sometimes...it doesnt get easier, until you've gotten a good dose of
the worse - And...thats what Im getting..
its ok...cuz i know something...
it wont make me smoke...im past that now...just hit my worse moments
ever this past weekend...smoking didnt enter my mind...
as i said...its tough....sometimes when you expect things to be better
and they're not...ya think that THAT gives you a reason to smoke...but
its only testing you...until its no longer a part of you.

ive reached the bottom.............can i move up now?
Steve

Four months, one week, six days, 22 hours, 2 minutes and 11 seconds.
3397 cigarettes not smoked, saving $543.67. Life saved: 1 week, 4
days, 19 hours, 5 minutes.

Steve,
We all miss you too. I am so sorry you're going through the rough time. I
am so proud of your meter.
We love you

--
AZ

"SilentNight" <M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1193763477.788344.138200@57g2000hsv.googlegro ups.com...
> saying hello to all my friends.
> I miss all of you - thinking of you.
> Sometimes...it doesnt get easier, until you've gotten a good dose of
> the worse - And...thats what Im getting..
> its ok...cuz i know something...
> it wont make me smoke...im past that now...just hit my worse moments
> ever this past weekend...smoking didnt enter my mind...
> as i said...its tough....sometimes when you expect things to be better
> and they're not...ya think that THAT gives you a reason to smoke...but
> its only testing you...until its no longer a part of you.
>
> ive reached the bottom.............can i move up now?
> Steve
>
> Four months, one week, six days, 22 hours, 2 minutes and 11 seconds.
> 3397 cigarettes not smoked, saving $543.67. Life saved: 1 week, 4
> days, 19 hours, 5 minutes.
>

Once upon a time, SilentNight said:

>saying hello to all my friends.
>I miss all of you - thinking of you.
>Sometimes...it doesnt get easier, until you've gotten a good dose of
>the worse - And...thats what Im getting..
>its ok...cuz i know something...
>it wont make me smoke...im past that now...just hit my worse moments
>ever this past weekend...smoking didnt enter my mind...
>as i said...its tough....sometimes when you expect things to be better
>and they're not...ya think that THAT gives you a reason to smoke...but
>its only testing you...until its no longer a part of you.
>
>ive reached the bottom.............can i move up now?

Pour it out Steve. It will hopefully make you feel a little bit
better.
(((((((((((( Steve ))))))))))))))

--
Tihomir 5M *I don't smoke anymore*

The government solution to a problem is usually as bad as the problem.

On Oct 30, 11:57 am, SilentNight <M.Better...@gmail.com> wrote:

>
> ive reached the bottom.............can i move up now?
> Steve
>
> Four months, one week, six days, 22 hours, 2 minutes and 11 seconds.
> 3397 cigarettes not smoked, saving $543.67. Life saved: 1 week, 4
> days, 19 hours, 5 minutes.

Yep, you can get off the elevator on this floor and take the stairs
back up.

Really Sorry to hear you're having such a rough time.
It'll get better, I know it will.

Thanks Guys..........
Im not giving up........The fat lady hasnt sung yet....so, Im still
boxing...
I thank God for you all, and others..and God himself....

Im still here

Im still alive

Im still fighting


F A I T H

Faith is the substance of things Hoped For...the Evidence of things
NOT seen.

Steve.
p.s. Anyone heard from my QuitBuddie Ashley (Writer) ??

On Tue, 30 Oct 2007 09:57:57 -0700, SilentNight
<M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote:

>saying hello to all my friends.
>I miss all of you - thinking of you.
>Sometimes...it doesnt get easier, until you've gotten a good dose of
>the worse - And...thats what Im getting..
>its ok...cuz i know something...
>it wont make me smoke...im past that now...just hit my worse moments
>ever this past weekend...smoking didnt enter my mind...
>as i said...its tough....sometimes when you expect things to be better
>and they're not...ya think that THAT gives you a reason to smoke...but
>its only testing you...until its no longer a part of you.
>
>ive reached the bottom.............can i move up now?
>Steve
>
>Four months, one week, six days, 22 hours, 2 minutes and 11 seconds.
>3397 cigarettes not smoked, saving $543.67. Life saved: 1 week, 4
>days, 19 hours, 5 minutes.

I didn't see your post until this morning. I'm so sorry that things
aren't going well. Gosh, it seemed as though things were really
looking up just a week or so ago.
Steve, I know you won't smoke. You have been through so much and
you've stayed so strong. I have tremendous admiration for you.

Your statement "ive reached the bottom.............can i move up
now?" reminds me of that book title 'Been Down So Long It Looks Like
Up to Me'. I hope things improve for you really soon.
Sue

Cliches are cliches because they are true, so here's the cliche: It's
always darkest before the dawn.

You have told us some of the things that have been going better for you, and
it sounds like you're trending in the right direction. And then in the same
day, I think, maybe the next day, you talk about being at the worst .
Maybe, because you've now had a taste of feeling good, it feels even worse
when you feel bad, because now you're comparing the two. Try to focus on
the fact that things are looking up; it's still a struggle but it IS getting
better. Try to focus on the good part, and nurture whatever it is that
makes you feel good and makes you feel validated. Even the happiest of
people have bad days.

Sometimes the mind can play tricks to make you think everything sucks more
than it actually objectively does, if you were able to be on the outside
looking in and judge it from the perspective. It's almost like the
nicodemon, except he's the doomsday demon or the depression demon -- I don't
know what to call him but I am very aware, especially since I stopped
smoking and met Mr. Nicodemon, that very strong feelings can hit you over
the head for no apparent reason. So here's an example of the mind playing
such games - my mind: Yesterday, I had a wonderful day, most of the day.
Late last night, something mildly unpleasant happened but it made me
absolutely stew -- lost sleep and everything. This morning I woke up
feeling like "why do I bother to keep on trying," and spent the morning
journaling how awful I felt and what I wanted to say to the person who did
the thing that made me feel this way. Then something mildly nice happened,
oh, maybe about an hour ago. I think this started different synapses firing
or different "happy" chemicals flowing in my brain. So now, after stewing
all night and morning, I feel like it's a beautiful wonderful day. It's as
if, if I'm not getting a steady supply of pleasantness, then everything has
got to be bad. There's no neutral lately, it's either good or bad. So,
maybe, for me, I need to seek the pleasant, even if it "gee what a lovely
tree outside my window. God did a good job making that tree." Maybe
that'll start, and keep, the happy chemicals flowing. Just a theory I
pulled out of my ass while writing this, actually. I cannot guarantee
results.

It's not really advice, I guess - just an observation that your perspective
of your situation can change, and has changed, on a dime. There is good
stuff starting to happen, so focus on it. Try (I know it's hard, but try)
not to sweat the other stuff. You have life, you have health, you have a
job and a home, you have friends and talent, you have strangers who have
shown you kindnesses that you never expected. You've got sunshine on a
cloudy day. When it's cold outside, you've got the month of May. Life may
not be what you want it to be, but it's not a desolate shit heap either.
It's not, and you know it now.

So, in answer to your question: Yes, you may move up now.

With love,

Jaime

I have achieved nine months, two weeks, two days, 14 hours, 46 minutes and 9
seconds, of smoke-free living (and, with it, rather aggressive driving).
This amounts to 8688 cigarettes not smoked, saving $2,063.21, and adding 4
weeks, 2 days, 4 hours, 0 minutes to my fabulous life.



"SilentNight" <M.BetterOff@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1193763477.788344.138200@57g2000hsv.googlegro ups.com...
> saying hello to all my friends.
> I miss all of you - thinking of you.
> Sometimes...it doesnt get easier, until you've gotten a good dose of
> the worse - And...thats what Im getting..
> its ok...cuz i know something...
> it wont make me smoke...im past that now...just hit my worse moments
> ever this past weekend...smoking didnt enter my mind...
> as i said...its tough....sometimes when you expect things to be better
> and they're not...ya think that THAT gives you a reason to smoke...but
> its only testing you...until its no longer a part of you.
>
> ive reached the bottom.............can i move up now?
> Steve
>
> Four months, one week, six days, 22 hours, 2 minutes and 11 seconds.
> 3397 cigarettes not smoked, saving $543.67. Life saved: 1 week, 4
> days, 19 hours, 5 minutes.
>

Steve, when you are at the bottom, the only way to go is UP, so just
hang in there and know that it will and can get better. Gaining
control over your smobriety is one great step and you know you can
work on the others with success as well.

FlatironMike
Eight months, three weeks, 17 hours, 5 minutes and 47 seconds. 5274
cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,582.02. Life saved: 2 weeks, 4 days,
7 hours, 30 minutes.

YES~! Yes, you can move up, QB. And I'm here to help you.
/grabs Steve's arm and hauls him up

Going through tough times sucks. But going through tough times and NOT
having smoking enter your mind -- that's something to be glad about.

It won't make anything better. You know that. I know that. We all know
that.

I'm sorry things didn't go well over the weekend. What happened to all
that optimism? E-mail me if you want.
I miss you too. You need to get some internet or something, cause I
want to hear from you MORE!

I posted in response to your *ping*! Maybe you didn't see it. But I'm
still right here, pulling for you!

(((((((Steve)))))))

Love and hugs
Ashley

Once upon a time, BostonJW (Lurking007) said:

>Then something mildly nice happened,
>oh, maybe about an hour ago. I think this started different synapses firing
>or different "happy" chemicals flowing in my brain. So now, after stewing
>all night and morning, I feel like it's a beautiful wonderful day. It's as
>if, if I'm not getting a steady supply of pleasantness, then everything has
>got to be bad. There's no neutral lately, it's either good or bad. So,
>maybe, for me, I need to seek the pleasant, even if it "gee what a lovely
>tree outside my window. God did a good job making that tree."

What a great post! I will keep this for times I get the blues.
Thank you Jaime.

--
Tihomir 5M *I don't smoke anymore*

.... Bad Spellers of The World Untie! get it? oh, well..

Absolutely! That's a nice one. Thank you, Jaime.

On Nov 1, 5:35 pm, writer272002 <writer272...@gmail.com> wrote:
> YES~! Yes, you can move up, QB. And I'm here to help you.
> /grabs Steve's arm and hauls him up
>
> Going through tough times sucks. But going through tough times and NOT
> having smoking enter your mind -- that's something to be glad about.
>
> It won't make anything better. You know that. I know that. We all know
> that.
>
> I'm sorry things didn't go well over the weekend. What happened to all
> that optimism? E-mail me if you want.
> I miss you too. You need to get some internet or something, cause I
> want to hear from you MORE!
>
> I posted in response to your *ping*! Maybe you didn't see it. But I'm
> still right here, pulling for you!
>
> (((((((Steve)))))))
>
> Love and hugs
> Ashley

Ashley,
Sorry, I just got this, Ive been sick for a week now (it began on
friday)
Coming out of it though...
Life here in FL sucks bigtime....
I just dont like it here...andcant do much about it, being broke and
all...
so...just gonna btch right now....and say...
athis place sucks
sorry

Steve
Four months, two weeks, three days, 9 hours, 48 minutes and 41
seconds.
3485 cigarettes not smoked, saving $557.63. Life saved: 1 week, 5
days, 2 hours, 25 minutes.

On Nov 1, 1:17 pm, "BostonJW \(Lurking007\)" <bosto...@ay-oh-el.com>
wrote:
> Cliches are cliches because they are true, so here's the cliche: It's
> always darkest before the dawn.
>
> You have told us some of the things that have been going better for you, and
> it sounds like you're trending in the right direction. And then in the same
> day, I think, maybe the next day, you talk about being at the worst .
> Maybe, because you've now had a taste of feeling good, it feels even worse
> when you feel bad, because now you're comparing the two. Try to focus on
> the fact that things are looking up; it's still a struggle but it IS getting
> better. Try to focus on the good part, and nurture whatever it is that
> makes you feel good and makes you feel validated. Even the happiest of
> people have bad days.
>
> Sometimes the mind can play tricks to make you think everything sucks more
> than it actually objectively does, if you were able to be on the outside
> looking in and judge it from the perspective. It's almost like the
> nicodemon, except he's the doomsday demon or the depression demon -- I don't
> know what to call him but I am very aware, especially since I stopped
> smoking and met Mr. Nicodemon, that very strong feelings can hit you over
> the head for no apparent reason. So here's an example of the mind playing
> such games - my mind: Yesterday, I had a wonderful day, most of the day.
> Late last night, something mildly unpleasant happened but it made me
> absolutely stew -- lost sleep and everything. This morning I woke up
> feeling like "why do I bother to keep on trying," and spent the morning
> journaling how awful I felt and what I wanted to say to the person who did
> the thing that made me feel this way. Then something mildly nice happened,
> oh, maybe about an hour ago. I think this started different synapses firing
> or different "happy" chemicals flowing in my brain. So now, after stewing
> all night and morning, I feel like it's a beautiful wonderful day. It's as
> if, if I'm not getting a steady supply of pleasantness, then everything has
> got to be bad. There's no neutral lately, it's either good or bad. So,
> maybe, for me, I need to seek the pleasant, even if it "gee what a lovely
> tree outside my window. God did a good job making that tree." Maybe
> that'll start, and keep, the happy chemicals flowing. Just a theory I
> pulled out of my ass while writing this, actually. I cannot guarantee
> results.
>
> It's not really advice, I guess - just an observation that your perspective
> of your situation can change, and has changed, on a dime. There is good
> stuff starting to happen, so focus on it. Try (I know it's hard, but try)
> not to sweat the other stuff. You have life, you have health, you have a
> job and a home, you have friends and talent, you have strangers who have
> shown you kindnesses that you never expected. You've got sunshine on a
> cloudy day. When it's cold outside, you've got the month of May. Life may
> not be what you want it to be, but it's not a desolate shit heap either.
> It's not, and you know it now.
>
> So, in answer to your question: Yes, you may move up now.
>
> With love,
>
> Jaime
>
> I have achieved nine months, two weeks, two days, 14 hours, 46 minutes and 9
> seconds, of smoke-free living (and, with it, rather aggressive driving).
> This amounts to 8688 cigarettes not smoked, saving $2,063.21, and adding 4
> weeks, 2 days, 4 hours, 0 minutes to my fabulous life.
>
> "SilentNight" <M.Better...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>
> news:1193763477.788344.138200@57g2000hsv.googlegro ups.com...
>
>
>
> > saying hello to all my friends.
> > I miss all of you - thinking of you.
> > Sometimes...it doesnt get easier, until you've gotten a good dose of
> > the worse - And...thats what Im getting..
> > its ok...cuz i know something...
> > it wont make me smoke...im past that now...just hit my worse moments
> > ever this past weekend...smoking didnt enter my mind...
> > as i said...its tough....sometimes when you expect things to be better
> > and they're not...ya think that THAT gives you a reason to smoke...but
> > its only testing you...until its no longer a part of you.
>
> > ive reached the bottom.............can i move up now?
> > Steve
>
> > Four months, one week, six days, 22 hours, 2 minutes and 11 seconds.
> > 3397 cigarettes not smoked, saving $543.67. Life saved: 1 week, 4
> > days, 19 hours, 5 minutes.- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

Jaime,

That was really good.
Thank you. Words from the heart.
Yes..your right...black and white thinking....anything can tip me over
cuz Im so darn sensitive to anything...my antenna are up and buzzing
around...just feeling everything out...AND...feeling EVERY ONE out as
well....its all mainly a knee jerk reaction to a past trauma....
Hugs to ya
Steve

On Nov 1, 5:35 pm, writer272002 <writer272...@gmail.com> wrote:
> YES~! Yes, you can move up, QB. And I'm here to help you.
> /grabs Steve's arm and hauls him up
>
> Going through tough times sucks. But going through tough times and NOT
> having smoking enter your mind -- that's something to be glad about.
>
> It won't make anything better. You know that. I know that. We all know
> that.
>
> I'm sorry things didn't go well over the weekend. What happened to all
> that optimism? E-mail me if you want.
> I miss you too. You need to get some internet or something, cause I
> want to hear from you MORE!
>
> I posted in response to your *ping*! Maybe you didn't see it. But I'm
> still right here, pulling for you!
>
> (((((((Steve)))))))
>
> Love and hugs
> Ashley

BIG HUGS
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( Ashley )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

BIG HUGS to you

(((((((((((((((Steve)))))))))))))))))

Everything is gonna be OK!