Need some help..

I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???

Sicamous

Hi Sicamous,

I am a little over three years into my quit.
I don't have cravings anymore, but I do think about smoking from time
to time. It would be so easy for me to pick up a cig and smoke it.

I am not willing to give up the freedom that was so hard to win. I am
free not to stink. I am free not to huddle in the cold and rain and
pretend that is pleasure when it is a sick addiction. I am free to
save tons of money not smoking. I am free to feel good about myself
because I broke that horrible loop called " I can't get no
satisfaction."

I never carry lighters or matches. I read and post here as often as I
can. I avoid smokers. I don't shun them or anything, but when the
smokes come out I go somewhere else.

Stay with your quit. It is worth it. It does get better. Those damn
cigs will kill you and make you die a horrible, painful death.

Please go to quitbuddies.org, go to the links page and read some of
those web sites. Very helpful.

Oh, yes, and remember - don't smoke.

Fred



On Tue, 15 Jan 2008 16:02:03 -0800 (PST), sicamous
<sicamous@hotmail.com> wrote:

>I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
>getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
>made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
>is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
>particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
>kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
>until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
>started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
>dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
>be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
>very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???
>
>Sicamous


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On Jan 16, 11:02*am, sicamous <sicam...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
> made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
> is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
> particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
> kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
> until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
> started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
> dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
> be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
> very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???
>
> Sicamous

Sicamous,
They may not "come endlessly". Things should get better For
myself, I very seldom now get the urge to light up, but I live
surrounded by smokers. For me, to go back to smokeing would not be a
relapse, but taking on a whole new bad habit. I hope some of this
helps. I vividly recall the shitty bit in the middle when the dumps
were setting in and not much was looking up (except AS3) - but it got
much better. Its been years since I _really_ wanted a smoke, even when
drunk.

Iago
Five years, one month, four weeks, one day, 13 hours, 0 minutes and 49
seconds. 56566 cigarettes not smoked, saving $20,740.96. Life saved:
28 weeks, 9 hours, 50 minutes.

Hey Sic,
Fear is the biggest obstacle to success.

If you look at quitting smoking as an endless sea of struggle - that is
what you will see and feel.

Craves and urges are only as strong as you let them become. If you feed
them daily then they grow until they consume you.

Every time you get a crave or a smoking thought - take 16 seconds to
replace that crave/smoking thought with a deep concentrated breath.
Learn to feel oxygen as it moves through your body

Take the time now to learn about your respiratory system and how your
lungs function. Once you do the research, you won't really ever feel
comfortable inhaling carcinogens again.

Getting tired of the fight is part of the early days of any good quit.
Just think of how much tireder you could be with a smoking-related
disease such as PAD, COPD, emphysema, or lung cancer.

Hang in here and keep posting and sorting this out - you can do it x0x0x







sicamous wrote:
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
> made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
> is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
> particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
> kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
> until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
> started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
> dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
> be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
> very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???
>
> Sicamous

On Jan 15, 7:02*pm, sicamous <sicam...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
> made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
> is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
> particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
> kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
> until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
> started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
> dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
> be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
> very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???
>
> Sicamous

Hi Sicamous - you've got some great advice here I do hope it
helps .... all I can add is try and focus on the point that you aren't
actually 'giving up' anything, because smoking doesn't have any
benefits - none - not any -ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! The only reason you
ever wanted to smoke was caused by the smoke itself - and as long as
you feed the addiction that feeling will never go away - addiction is
just a trap - a nasty wicked one granted, but one you have the choice
to walk away from, and be free from. I can relate to what you say
about your mother-in-law, as my own mum quit in 2000 and still claims
she misses it, but my dad (who sadly recently passed away of lung
cancer) quit for almost 8 years before he died, and never missed it at
all, in fact he said he'd rather staple his tongue to the wall than
smoke another cigarette because healthwise it would be more
beneificial .

If he could do it anyone can - and you most certainly can. It does get
better if you let it.

Karen

One week, three days, 20 hours, 14 minutes and 43 seconds. 216
cigarettes not smoked, saving $81.32. Life saved: 18 hours, 0 minutes.

"Knowledge speaks but wisdom listens." - Jimi Hendrix

On Jan 15, 7:02*pm, sicamous <sicam...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
> made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
> is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
> particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
> kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
> until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
> started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
> dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
> be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
> very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???
>
> Sicamous

Sicamous - Read these posts and "listen" to these people - they know
of which they speak. Stop feeling like you are "losing" something -
you are "getting rid of" a terrible addiction. You've made the first
step, and now you need to continue the journey.
Hugs,
Ms Preaching Person
Pam

Repeat this to yourself until you start to believe it: IT'S JUST NOT
WORTH IT.
Smoking is JUST NOT WORTH IT.
Not worth the money, not worth the time (outside in the rain, for
instance), not worth the trouble, not worth smelling stinky, not worth
destroying your health.
It's NOT WORTH IT.
The Nicodemon will try to convince you that it is. But it isn't.
And if you smoke, you will feel even worse.
You do not have a lifetime of trials. The cravings WILL go away, at
least they will get very very rare.
But here's the trick: Don't smoke. Not at all. None of this full-blown
business. That's semantics, and if you do it you're playing with fire.
Don't smoke. Not even one. Especially not one.

Love and hugs to you.
Ashley

"sicamous" <sicamous@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:c2684c56-98e9-49f2-823d-025dbce52563@q39g2000hsf.googlegroups.com...
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
> made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
> is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
> particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
> kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
> until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
> started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
> dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
> be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
> very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???


Look at it this way maybe: each and every crave is an attack by
a hideous monster that wants to shorten and increase the suffering
of your life, which you get to beat the tar out of with self denial,
until the bloody thing cowers away whimpering.

I can do that every day, can't you?
You just need the right attitude.
I feel where you are coming from, though.

Mark
oof

On Tue, 15 Jan 2008 16:02:03 -0800 (PST), sicamous
<sicamous@hotmail.com> wrote:

>I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
>getting tired of the fight.

If you're tired then go to bed and take a nap.

> This is what foiled my last attempt and
>made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
>is right,

Write them out and post them in front of your face.

> just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
>particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly.

Piffle. No, they don't. You may think they do, but they don't. Oh,
sure. One might pop up every now and again but they sure aren't going
to be like they are now.

> It's
>kind of like saying "uncle".

No, no, no, no, NO!!

>All I can see is the struggle from now
>until forever lol.

Again. No!!! It will not be such a struggle forever. It *will* get
better. Every single quitter on this NG will tell you the same thing.

> My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
>started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
>dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
>be so strong.

Did you ask her why she started again? It may have been the old, "Oh,
I can have just one" business. No, you can't.

> All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
>very motivating.

If that's what you're seeing you need to change your glasses
prescription because your vision isn't very good.

> Thoughts anyone? Please???

Easy to say, not so easy to do ------ don't smoke!! You think you
feel bad now? Ha! How do you think your mother-in-law feels? Your
quit group is about to get a name. Don't you want to be a part of
that? Do you want to go through *this* again? Of course not. It
*does* get better.

Quitting is like giving birth. It isn't easy. It is, in its own way,
just as painful. But, look what you get when you're done!! A new,
healthy, clean smelling, happy (yes!) you! When you reach OF status
and go into the tubs it's like a baptism ceremony.
Stay strong, stay stubborn and stay committed to the new you.
Sue
One year, nine months, three weeks, four days, 19 hours, 43 minutes
and 44 seconds. 21972 cigarettes not smoked, saving $3,658.59. Life
saved: 10 weeks, 6 days, 7 hours, 0 minutes.


>
>Sicamous

Sicamous! There is a LOT of useful information already given to you
in this thread. Have you written down WHY you are quitting and what
you expect to gain from it? If you have not, NOW is the time to do
this because writing it down makes it that much more concrete and
real.

As to the craving, they will not be as rough as they are right now.
If you are tired, go to bed and get some extra sleep. Tomorrow may
well not be as hard as today and little by little it does get better.
To give up now means that when you quit again [and you will] you will
only have to go through all this crap again.

Get it behind you and get a much better life in the process!

Hang Tuff
Don't Puff

FlatironMike
Eleven months, four days, 23 hours, 6 minutes and 19 seconds. 6779
cigarettes not smoked, saving $2,033.78. Life saved: 3 weeks, 2 days,
12 hours, 55 minutes.

sicamous wrote:
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. . .

Be patient. You are recovering from a fatal addiction.
Allow yourself time to heal. Believe me, in not so very long, all of
this will seem to have been a minor bump in the road to a happy, healthy
freedom.

Maude

On Jan 15, 7:02�pm, sicamous <sicam...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
> made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
> is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
> particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
> kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
> until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
> started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
> dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
> be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
> very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???
>
> Sicamous

When my mother died, and I couldn't imagine the rest of my life
without her, someone told me "Don't think too far ahead; just get
through today." Of course, the grief got better with time as they knew
it would.

So, don't dread how you may or may not feel in the future. You will be
a different person then. Just get through today, and have faith in the
people who are telling you that it *will* get better. They are more
rational than you and I right now, as they are not in the midst of
drug withdrawal. Trust them and let them lead us both through this
journey. They have not led me wrong yet.

Grace- 28 days

Well,,,, here it is 5 hours later.
Tell us how you got thru it.

It's never a constant struggle. your MIL probably had a moment of weakness
and had that "just one " thought. you know where just one leads to right? to
another and another.
Although I don't have 7 years I can tell you craves are never what they are
like now for you. some of us think of smoking as like having the worst SOB
boyfriend ever to walk on this earth who mistreated us and generally wore us
down but in a moment of weakness we might remember they didn't spit on the
floor like they normally did and in our addictive mind we see that as them
as being good. crazy huh?

there is nothing good about smoking. I want you to go to www.quitbuddies.org
and find 20 buddies in a pack ( I could point it out but hey you need to
find this for youself) pay attention to the #20
--
Lynn VOF Leaper
"Everyone seems normal until you get to know them."




"sicamous" <sicamous@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:c2684c56-98e9-49f2-823d-025dbce52563@q39g2000hsf.googlegroups.com...
> I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
> getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
> made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
> is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
> particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
> kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
> until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
> started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
> dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
> be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
> very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???
>
> Sicamous

On Jan 15, 11:29 pm, DavidL <Dvd...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Well,,,, here it is 5 hours later.
> Tell us how you got thru it.

Well I'd like to thank all of you for your advice and encouragement. I
am still hanging in there. Went to bed early, but got a pleasant
surprise before I did so.... my sig. other came home this evening
smoke free! I know my quit does not depend on anyone else but me, but
I think the fact that our home is now smoke free is going to help. I
know that sometimes I let myself get overwhelmed with stress/grief etc
to the point where I start to feel powerless. I think I need to stop
thinking of "the rest of my life" and just deal with my life in the
here and now. Thanks again everyone for your support.

Sicamous

On Jan 16, 8:27*am, sicamous <sicam...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> On Jan 15, 11:29 pm, DavidL <Dvd...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > Well,,,, * here it is 5 hours later.
> > Tell us how you got thru it.
>
> Well I'd like to thank all of you for your advice and encouragement. I
> am still hanging in there. Went to bed early, but got a pleasant
> surprise before I did so.... my sig. other came home this evening
> smoke free! I know my quit does not depend on anyone else but me, but
> I think the fact that our home is now smoke free is going to help. I
> know that sometimes I let myself get overwhelmed with stress/grief etc
> to the point where I start to feel powerless. I think I need to stop
> thinking of "the rest of my life" and just deal with my life in the
> here and now. Thanks again everyone for your support.
>
> Sicamous

That is way cool. Clean that place top to bottom.
I might smoke a carton tomorrow, or on my next birthday, or when my
first kid gets married or when the comet is abouit to strike.
But,,,,,, I am not gonna even look at a cigarette today!

Sicamous! You are so right that when we look at 'the rest of our
lives' it is hard to imagine that we will never smoke again or any
other sort of addictive behaviour. But if you look at 'today' then
you know that you can tell yourself "I won't smoke today" and know you
can do that. Keep it simple. Our addictions usually push us to over
complicated scenarios that usually just make us nutz and give up!

Hang Tuff
Don't Puff

And congrats on the SO getting smober too!!!

FlatironMike
Eleven months, five days, 11 hours, 47 minutes and 24 seconds. 6789
cigarettes not smoked, saving $2,036.95. Life saved: 3 weeks, 2 days,
13 hours, 45 minutes.

Instead of taking 13 puffs of smoke, sicamous spoketh upon us:

>I'm kind of going through what Siley was going through earlier... I'm
>getting tired of the fight. This is what foiled my last attempt and
>made me doubt this one. I know all the reasons why I quit and why it
>is right, just seems like that those are fading, it's not the
>particular craves, it's knowing they are going to come endlessly. It's
>kind of like saying "uncle". All I can see is the struggle from now
>until forever lol. My mother in law, who has been quit for 7 years has
>started smoking on the sly again, not back to full blown but still. I
>dread the thought that after seven years the cravings and urges would
>be so strong. All I can see right now are a lifetime of trials, not
>very motivating. Thoughts anyone? Please???

Your MIL did not bust her 7 years quit because she was craving like
you are now. She either felt overly confident or had a major stress or
something along those lines. Nothing like you are experiencing. She
DID NOT battle the cravings constantly for 7 years.
WHat it comes down to, it's just the old rusty nico fart junkie trying
to change your mind. And you know better. Remember Pam's friend with
oral cancer. Pam posted that just for moments like this. Kick the old
fart in the nuts and keep on walking the path over the hill.

--
Tihomir 7M2W, Knin, HR 44°N 16°E
http://www.usenetpedia.com/google-groups.html

"The immature artist imitates. the mature artist steals." - Lionel Trilling