Ping*people unhappy with AS3

Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk, yet
email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree with him
that profanity is used here?.....
Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
soap opera.
LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite everyone's
tastes.
Thank you.
Hugs,
Cat
---
2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m 2w
3d 23:35 life saved
Ex-serial-quitter!

I've decided that I will contribute by posting helpful articles once
again

CuckooCat wrote:
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as
> someone who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not
> a soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved,
> 4m 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

--
Reminder: don't forget to let my inner child loose...

I just hope the condescending attitude of one person hasn't chased off
any lurkers. I've felt like I've been slapped in the face but FUCK
IT...I'll be posting jokes regularly again.... :-)

Sally...thanks to THE friendliest support group ever I've been quit
for:
Three years, eight months, six days, 22 hours, 40 minutes and 2
seconds. 40378 cigarettes not smoked, saving $8,842.58. Life saved: 20
weeks, 4 hours, 50 minutes.


On Sun, 7 Sep 2008 20:51:12 -0500, "CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net>
wrote:

>Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk, yet
>email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree with him
>that profanity is used here?.....
>Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
>someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
>who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
>PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
>To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
>soap opera.
>LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
>Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite everyone's
>tastes.
>Thank you.
>Hugs,
>Cat
>---
>2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m 2w
>3d 23:35 life saved
>Ex-serial-quitter!
>

Cat, I think anyone new here will very soon value our group as what it is. A
great place with lots of support but also with lots of different opinions.
All its needed from all sites its honesty, respect and the freedom to say
what we think as long no one gets hurt. Like real life people don't always
have the same opinion but still can get along with each other. It is as
others have said take what you need and leave the rest alone.

One of the main reason why we avoid topics like politics and religion in
here is to prevent big arguments. There was someone who tried it and was put
back in place and he wasn't to happy about it. Maybe this is one reason why
he is leaving now. (Just a thought)

There are others who want to stir some fire and feel happy if they succeed
(e.g. trolls). We just have to ignore them as we most of the time do.

as in regards to the e-mails it's best to simply ignore them or maybe just
forward one of them to the newsgroup, so the lurker who ever it is gets a
message that he is going public. or at least share it with someone else
before getting angry at an entire newsgroup. I believe who doesn't have the
guts to speak openly and has to insult a single person is not worth our
time.

/me has no intention to offend anyone. So just read my response as what it
is MY opinion and my opinion alone.

((( Cat ))) just letting you know that you are doing a great job.

PolarBear
--
"There is a light at the end of every
tunnel ..just pray it's not a train!"
/me walking in a tunnel until she finds the light.



"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

On Sun, 7 Sep 2008 20:51:12 -0500, "CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net>
wrote:

>Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk, yet
>email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree with him
>that profanity is used here?.....
>Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
>someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
>who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
>PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
>To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
>soap opera.
>LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
>Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite everyone's
>tastes.
>Thank you.
>Hugs,
>Cat
>---
>2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m 2w
>3d 23:35 life saved
>Ex-serial-quitter!
>
AS3 is the greatest group of people, in my opinion.
I would not change anything, except maybe some of my previous really
stupid posts.
Fred


Posted Via Usenet.com Premium Usenet Newsgroup Services
----------------------------------------------------------
http://www.usenet.com

"CuckooCat"
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing.

Wayne is a snippy secret emailing weenie. Glad he's gone, and I hope he
keeps his word but I doubt he will.

:-p~~~~~~~ Keven
Don't ever forget why you quit.

Thanks for posting this, Cat. I am sorry about how Wayne decided he
needed to exit here, but we can *not* be everything for everyone and
get it right 100% of the time. I do think most folk who drift away
either have moved on with their lives and smoking is just not a part
of it now and they don't want the reminder. Or some do backslide and
wind back smoking. I did find that to be the case with a few of the
folks who had been on the list prior to my re-certification. Still,
everyone who responded said that AS3 had been a limpchin in their
quits and fondly love 'us'. I can not speak to the 189 emails that AZ
got since I really do not know what their point of view was. As to
being snippy, I do get an occassional email from folks here but
ususally it's on an OT subject.

I do agree with you that AS3 does save lives and I do want to see us
stay here strong and kicking butt!

FlatironMike
One year, six months, four weeks, 1 hour, 9 minutes and 30 seconds.
11500 cigarettes not smoked, saving $3,450.04. Life saved: 5 weeks, 4
days, 22 hours, 20 minutes.

Hello all,

For as long as I've been here there have always been a few folks who
can't find their way to be happily smober and who want to stir up the
pot behind the scenes because, well, misery loves company.

Sometimes these people will work up a little following and convince a
few folks that the rest of the group is <insert gripe of the week> and
needs "saving" of some sort, and that little following will get all
atwitter with imagined self importance over said salvation. But the
bottom line is always that AS3 tends to roll along and weather these
periodic fits of whatever. Most of us don't expect AS3 to be a place of
perfection nor do we expect perfection from the people who make up AS3.
We're all just human, after all. But someone will always have their
panties in a twist here because that's just human nature.

Business as usual, I figure.

Hugs,

elle



FlatIronMike wrote:
> Thanks for posting this, Cat. I am sorry about how Wayne decided he
> needed to exit here, but we can *not* be everything for everyone and
> get it right 100% of the time. I do think most folk who drift away
> either have moved on with their lives and smoking is just not a part
> of it now and they don't want the reminder. Or some do backslide and
> wind back smoking. I did find that to be the case with a few of the
> folks who had been on the list prior to my re-certification. Still,
> everyone who responded said that AS3 had been a limpchin in their
> quits and fondly love 'us'. I can not speak to the 189 emails that AZ
> got since I really do not know what their point of view was. As to
> being snippy, I do get an occassional email from folks here but
> ususally it's on an OT subject.
>
> I do agree with you that AS3 does save lives and I do want to see us
> stay here strong and kicking butt!
>
> FlatironMike
> One year, six months, four weeks, 1 hour, 9 minutes and 30 seconds.
> 11500 cigarettes not smoked, saving $3,450.04. Life saved: 5 weeks, 4
> days, 22 hours, 20 minutes.

Wayne and everyone else knows there was never any such thing.
The "I've received emails" line has been far overused. This may possibly
mean he has had a conversation with one person that agreed with him.
So much for being real - or humble - or seeking to give rather than take.
With hope and heart,
Kathleen



"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

I'm pissed off at the BDU. I told them to bury her up to her ankles.
Well I guess thats what they did, but I meant for her to be head down
not tup.

Mike M

On Sun, 7 Sep 2008 20:51:12 -0500, "CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net>
wrote:

>Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk, yet
>email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree with him
>that profanity is used here?.....
>Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
>someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
>who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
>PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
>To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
>soap opera.
>LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
>Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite everyone's
>tastes.
>Thank you.
>Hugs,
>Cat
>---
>2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m 2w
>3d 23:35 life saved
>Ex-serial-quitter!
>

i know i don't post much but as I'm wide awake at almost 6am,

this has always been a unmediated group (well apart from our guidelines
about commercial postings etc) and i believe this to be one of it's
strengths. i think it's wonderful that we come together to quit smoking
and, for many of us, find so much more in the process. Ok so we get a little
rough round the edges now and again but being adults we mostly sort
ourselves out sooner or later and get on with it. Who knows we might even
learn a thing or two from the experience!

On the other hand, we have to always be on guard regarding any person or
group of people that join a group and then try to change it. Was as3 crying
out for help? who 'ordered out' for the knights of the round table to come
in and 'clean up' the kingdom? i have always believed that if you don't
like something you either; learn to work around it, avoid it or pit yourself
against it! What you don't do is join it and then try to pull it apart.
Well i guess that is unless you feel yourself to be on a mission to 'save
the sinners' or 'clean up the neighbourhood' or something.

in my experience Those that claim the moral high ground have usually found
the biggest pile of shit to stand and preach on.

this is a quit smoking support group. as soon as we loose that focus we
become less than we should be. if someone is so offended by swearing then
killfile those that offend and the same goes for any other problems that
anyone has with particular individuals within this group. it's not rocket
science!!

if on the other hand someone is on a mission that has nothing to do with
smoking then start or join an appropriate group.

does anyone really have a problem with anyone expressing an opinion?
Preaching is another thing though and most of the time this group doesn't
even preach about quitting smoking so why should anyone here feel they can
preach about anything else?

Well that's enough preaching from me see you all tomorrow night for the
book burning (don't forget to bring some stones as it's not a proper night
out without smashing a few windows and we don't want to run out before the
jobs finished) anyone got any yellow paint?

so much to organise, so little time

ho hum









"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

> in my experience Those that claim the moral high ground have usually found
> the biggest pile of shit to stand and preach on.
>
That's one of the best things I think I've ever heard anyone say.

"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.

Well, maybe if we all had some nicely tailored uniforms..!
Totalitarian groups *do* always seem to have the coolest outfits, don't
they.
Wait; this isn't an autocratic regime.
I remember, now: We sort of do what we like, yeah? There's no Principal, or
Director, or Grand High Arbiter Of Taste.
People come in and look around; they watch and learn and get a feel for the
place and join in and ask questions and share experiences.
It's like that, yeah...? I think it's always been that way. I'm not sure
what could be done, actively, to make it a lot better here.
It's a very subjective experience, being here, isn't it? The general
atmosphere is usually pretty relaxed and tolerant and accepting of people.
Hell-- *I'd* never hang around a place that I found was terrifically
opposite to my own values, or that I saw as oppressive-- or that simply
couldn't take a joke. I'd feel like a freak and I'm fairly sure I'd be
unhappy.


> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.

Maybe we can petition the NSA under the Freedom Of Information Act and get
them to produce verification of the existence of The Hidden Manifesto of The
189 Secret, Email-Swapping Malcontents. Or whatever it is that's so
lurkingly all-powerful and yet... so well hidden and largely unspoken that
nobody else feels irritated by it. All that private, behind-the-scenes
melodrama (real-- with the 2 or 3 others who might echo your sentiments, or
manufactured-- you and your League Of Imaginary Pissed-Off Friends) doesn't
count with anyone whose emotional maturity is above the level of the
average, gum-chewing 14 year old.

Publicly, random chunks of the Bill of Rights seem to have been excised with
approval from the highest Executive levels currently in vogue, but we still
have the ability to exercise free speech and assembly in most places. Here,
for example, those whose views or style don't mesh with the general demeanor
displayed by the majority at any give moment **always** have options
available for their relief. They needn't be made to feel miserable, nor
compelled to adopt any uncomfortable style.

Option 1.) After explaining clearly what aggrieves him and receiving replies
on the subject, the enlightened person may or may not grasp the totality of
public expression at their diatribe, and react accordingly. This might take
the form of overwhelming relief at the vast, easy and unrestricted
acceptance of their point of view-- or it could consist of grudging (yet
gracious) acquiescence to the general tenor of the assembled crowd's
disagreement-- a "Take-what-you-need..." sort of approach, as you realize
that, hey-- not everyone feels that way. Maybe the offended party can
manage to settle down and roll with it. Either way the chips fall, this
often works fairly well and doesn't raise hackles or disrupt the
proceedings.

Option 2.) They can repeatedly state how unhappy and disappointed and
offended they are that their voice doesn't carry enough weight to sway
public opinion their way, and be unhappy that their tantrums aren't
sufficient to mold The Way It Should Be. This might be accompanied by
assertions that a liberal cadre of Godless, left-wing free-thinkers are
somehow controlling all that goes on in the environment they're so unhappy
with, and what can you expect, anyway, when radical bunch of elitists
actually insist on expressing themselves and disagreeing with you on certain
fundamental issues? You know-- like, the absolute horror of the idea that
free speech is... well, for... everybody? This isn't usually a very good
option, as it plays very poorly to the audience, generally speaking.

The usual response to this behavior seems to run along the lines of: "Yeah.
We get it. We hear you. We understood you the last 2 or 3 times you
announced that you were deeply offended and personally peeved that other
people chose to do or say something other than what you think is correct,
amusing, polite or fashionable. Uh huh. You don't like it. We *know*. It
pisses you off. It's old news, by now. Not everyone seems to agree with
you, or support your view, though. If they did, they might be inclined, in
this public forum, to step up and actually say so. Give the one-note
harangue a fucking rest, now, why dont you?"

Option 3.) They can accept that this environment is just a bad fit for them,
that it makes no sense to persist in their indignant foaming and yelping,
and that they can very easily go elsewhere for solace and fellowship. The
world is *huge*; the Internet is... well, it's fucking enormous, isn't it?
There are public meetings-- real and virtual-- of all sorts where you can
find people and temperaments to suit your own. Why not find a place you'll
fit in? Why stay where you're not comfortable, and grumble and carp and snap
about it? Find a better place! A church, a social club, a crafts group, an
AA or NA meeting might be helpful.

The Left-Handed, Xylophone-Playing, Lactose-Intolerant, Partially Bald,
Methodist Transvestites In Denial, United Against Car Pooling On Wednesdays
website is even giving out free bumper stickers for new members who register
with them this week. Every flavor and size and persuasion of... every goddam
thing you can name can be found out there. Seek out something that *works*
for you!

This option-- like the first one, and unlike the second one-- also works
pretty well, at least, for the rest of the people who've grown tired of the
outraged crybaby act and will be relieved when the whiny drama queen in
question *actually* fucks right off and stops bothering people.
And I don't necessarily mean that in a... um... possibly nice way, at all,
when you get right down to it.

> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.

Yep. It's true. Little else matters except genuinely helping someone else--
with an answer to a question, an anecdotal offering based on personal
experience, a kind word, a joke, a shoulder to cry on, or just some simple
encouragement.

> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.

Well, *that* isn't going to happen, simply due to the variety of tastes
found here.
You'll never craft something that'll work for everyone by appealing to the
gamut of public opinion. There's too much difference in style and
sensibility, background, education, street-smarts and communication skills
here. The best you can hope for is simple civility and good intentions. I
think most people bring that, anyway.

It's a wonder, sometimes, that most of us are still alive here. I mean, what
with the jangled nerves and the confusing feelings and the stress of
quitting and the severely strained forbearance that prevents us from beating
random strangers to death in grocery stores and what not... It's a
challenge. Still, the assholes tend not to last very long here-- haven't you
noticed? Natural selection applies.

Suit everyone? Shee-it; herd cats-- it'd be easier-- and far more
productive.
Say-- what about free balloons and pony rides?
We could also have a bake sale. I, for instance, would be happy to make some
tasty cupcakes.
I'm tired, now. Get back to me on the cupcake thing.
Or if there's going to be a pony.

I wouldn't change a thing about AS3, Cat. It is what it is -- a support
group that truly helps people quit smoking. It can't be, nor should it be,
the be-all-to-end-all for everyone. Quitting smoking is a personal
decision; our support group can help those that respond to this kind of
support.... some people can't. Some people look for excuses to start
smoking again or to be "holier than thou" and the variety of people's voices
in AS3 can be a convenient excuse for some to take that next puff.

I do like Bev's idea of contributing more positive messages here.... I also
love that, for the most part, differences of opinion can be stimulating and
exciting, and also can contribute to people's resolve to quit when they find
they get over their frustration without picking up a smoke.

AS3 has been critical in my quit and it's always humbling and amazing that
I, me, Lizzie, have done the hard work. None of us would quit smoking if we
didn't have the resolve to.... Thankfully, AS3 is here to hold our hand, or
smack our bottoms when it might seem that will work better.

Quitting smoking isn't a "take what you like and leave the rest" kind of
endeavor, at least for me. I had to take it all, sort through it, and
understand that no matter what life throws at me, I cannot smoke. Bottom
line. My choice, my decision.

All the best to any that enter here.....

Liz
OH MY GOD!!! I have reached 50,000 not smoked! What a fiend I must have
been!

Three years, five months, two days, 20 hours, 55 minutes and 44 seconds.
50074 cigarettes not smoked, saving $10,766.10. Life saved: 24 weeks, 5
days, 20 hours, 50 minutes.



"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

"Jef." <jefATquitbuddiesDOTorg> wrote in message
news:OKOdnYPpttqbSlnVnZ2dnUVZ_jKdnZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> "CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
> news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
>> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
>> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
>> with him that profanity is used here?.....
>> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
>
> Well, maybe if we all had some nicely tailored uniforms..!
> Totalitarian groups *do* always seem to have the coolest outfits, don't
> they.
> Wait; this isn't an autocratic regime.
> I remember, now: We sort of do what we like, yeah? There's no Principal,
> or Director, or Grand High Arbiter Of Taste.
> People come in and look around; they watch and learn and get a feel for
> the place and join in and ask questions and share experiences.
> It's like that, yeah...? I think it's always been that way. I'm not sure
> what could be done, actively, to make it a lot better here.
> It's a very subjective experience, being here, isn't it? The general
> atmosphere is usually pretty relaxed and tolerant and accepting of people.
> Hell-- *I'd* never hang around a place that I found was terrifically
> opposite to my own values, or that I saw as oppressive-- or that simply
> couldn't take a joke. I'd feel like a freak and I'm fairly sure I'd be
> unhappy.
>
>
>> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
>> soap opera.
>
> Maybe we can petition the NSA under the Freedom Of Information Act and get
> them to produce verification of the existence of The Hidden Manifesto of
> The 189 Secret, Email-Swapping Malcontents. Or whatever it is that's so
> lurkingly all-powerful and yet... so well hidden and largely unspoken that
> nobody else feels irritated by it. All that private, behind-the-scenes
> melodrama (real-- with the 2 or 3 others who might echo your sentiments,
> or manufactured-- you and your League Of Imaginary Pissed-Off Friends)
> doesn't count with anyone whose emotional maturity is above the level of
> the average, gum-chewing 14 year old.
>
> Publicly, random chunks of the Bill of Rights seem to have been excised
> with approval from the highest Executive levels currently in vogue, but we
> still have the ability to exercise free speech and assembly in most
> places. Here, for example, those whose views or style don't mesh with the
> general demeanor displayed by the majority at any give moment **always**
> have options available for their relief. They needn't be made to feel
> miserable, nor compelled to adopt any uncomfortable style.
>
> Option 1.) After explaining clearly what aggrieves him and receiving
> replies on the subject, the enlightened person may or may not grasp the
> totality of public expression at their diatribe, and react accordingly.
> This might take the form of overwhelming relief at the vast, easy and
> unrestricted acceptance of their point of view-- or it could consist of
> grudging (yet gracious) acquiescence to the general tenor of the assembled
> crowd's disagreement-- a "Take-what-you-need..." sort of approach, as you
> realize that, hey-- not everyone feels that way. Maybe the offended party
> can manage to settle down and roll with it. Either way the chips fall,
> this often works fairly well and doesn't raise hackles or disrupt the
> proceedings.
>
> Option 2.) They can repeatedly state how unhappy and disappointed and
> offended they are that their voice doesn't carry enough weight to sway
> public opinion their way, and be unhappy that their tantrums aren't
> sufficient to mold The Way It Should Be. This might be accompanied by
> assertions that a liberal cadre of Godless, left-wing free-thinkers are
> somehow controlling all that goes on in the environment they're so unhappy
> with, and what can you expect, anyway, when radical bunch of elitists
> actually insist on expressing themselves and disagreeing with you on
> certain fundamental issues? You know-- like, the absolute horror of the
> idea that free speech is... well, for... everybody? This isn't usually a
> very good option, as it plays very poorly to the audience, generally
> speaking.
>
> The usual response to this behavior seems to run along the lines of:
> "Yeah. We get it. We hear you. We understood you the last 2 or 3 times you
> announced that you were deeply offended and personally peeved that other
> people chose to do or say something other than what you think is correct,
> amusing, polite or fashionable. Uh huh. You don't like it. We *know*. It
> pisses you off. It's old news, by now. Not everyone seems to agree with
> you, or support your view, though. If they did, they might be inclined, in
> this public forum, to step up and actually say so. Give the one-note
> harangue a fucking rest, now, why dont you?"
>
> Option 3.) They can accept that this environment is just a bad fit for
> them, that it makes no sense to persist in their indignant foaming and
> yelping, and that they can very easily go elsewhere for solace and
> fellowship. The world is *huge*; the Internet is... well, it's fucking
> enormous, isn't it? There are public meetings-- real and virtual-- of all
> sorts where you can find people and temperaments to suit your own. Why not
> find a place you'll fit in? Why stay where you're not comfortable, and
> grumble and carp and snap about it? Find a better place! A church, a
> social club, a crafts group, an AA or NA meeting might be helpful.
>
> The Left-Handed, Xylophone-Playing, Lactose-Intolerant, Partially Bald,
> Methodist Transvestites In Denial, United Against Car Pooling On
> Wednesdays website is even giving out free bumper stickers for new members
> who register with them this week. Every flavor and size and persuasion
> of... every goddam thing you can name can be found out there. Seek out
> something that *works* for you!
>
> This option-- like the first one, and unlike the second one-- also works
> pretty well, at least, for the rest of the people who've grown tired of
> the outraged crybaby act and will be relieved when the whiny drama queen
> in question *actually* fucks right off and stops bothering people.
> And I don't necessarily mean that in a... um... possibly nice way, at
> all, when you get right down to it.
>
>> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
>
> Yep. It's true. Little else matters except genuinely helping someone
> else-- with an answer to a question, an anecdotal offering based on
> personal experience, a kind word, a joke, a shoulder to cry on, or just
> some simple encouragement.
>
>> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
>> everyone's tastes.
>
> Well, *that* isn't going to happen, simply due to the variety of tastes
> found here.
> You'll never craft something that'll work for everyone by appealing to the
> gamut of public opinion. There's too much difference in style and
> sensibility, background, education, street-smarts and communication skills
> here. The best you can hope for is simple civility and good intentions. I
> think most people bring that, anyway.
>
> It's a wonder, sometimes, that most of us are still alive here. I mean,
> what with the jangled nerves and the confusing feelings and the stress of
> quitting and the severely strained forbearance that prevents us from
> beating random strangers to death in grocery stores and what not... It's a
> challenge. Still, the assholes tend not to last very long here-- haven't
> you noticed? Natural selection applies.
>
> Suit everyone? Shee-it; herd cats-- it'd be easier-- and far more
> productive.
> Say-- what about free balloons and pony rides?
> We could also have a bake sale. I, for instance, would be happy to make
> some tasty cupcakes.
> I'm tired, now. Get back to me on the cupcake thing.
> Or if there's going to be a pony.
>
>
>

Ever the voice of reason, I love it, thanks Jef.

--
bambam

I don't think there is anything that could be improved, or for that
matter NEEDS to be improved. This place is a classic example of "it is
what it is" and that is how it should be. For an online community, this
place has fostered relationships and friendships that have endured far
beyond Usenet.
There will always be those who would change this group to meet their own
dynamic, and those who parachute in with their own agendas. These
situations are usually transitory in nature and as these people leave,
others show up to take their places. What makes this place special is
the core group of folks (and they are numerous) that continue to give of
themselves over and over again. This usually isn't seen in other online
communities.
I'm sorry that Wayne chose to leave, and I'm more sorry that he made
more out of his leaving than necessary. I can understand his
frustration but it doesn't change the fact that quitting smoking is
hard, and some folks just need to cuss their way through it. Oh well.
I've heard worse.
SteveS
OOF

CuckooCat wrote:
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as
> someone who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not
> a soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved,
> 4m 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

You don't honestly expect to hear from the malcontent, do you? In MHO if
they cared one hoot they would of posted here sooner but all you are going
to get is the people who love AS3 just the way it is
I wonder how many of these "people" help others along? cheer them when they
are down? even post a fucking WTG. the people who respond to other posts
this are the people who make AS3 better.
They might not like cussing but they don't jump all over the ones who do
and make them feel shitty for saying the F word. And they don't pop in out
of the blue and make a dig and leave again. they stay and fight and say
their point of view BUT can other points of view even if it doesn't match
their own.

Hell I don't even like some here but I see the good they do for this place,
they add to it, they make it better

You get what you put in. Don't want to add to the group? hope the door hits
you on the ass on the way out. I for one don't want them here.
What would I change to make this place better?
gee I don't know.. um... I like this place the way it is.
I like that people can come and post a rant with enough cuss words my hair
turns blue when they need to. I like that the oldbies ( this does not
includes me cause I ain't old) are here daily to help. I like that people
drop in just to say hi and post a meter that is so extremely huge it boggles
the mind. I like it when the newbies get that aha moment and knows they can
do it. I like the fights..the pretend ones and the real ones, I really do,
they give colour and excitement to a bland "yay" day. I like I can depend on
some to keep the best things from AS3 here.

What I don't like are the sympathy suckers, the cowards and the
BetterThanEveryOneElse. and those 189 "people" and the ones who e-mailed
Wayne offline bitching about this place and not trying to make this place
better are them. don't expect to hear from them Cat.

--
Lynn VOF+ Leaper
"Everyone seems normal until you get to know them."



"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

geez Mike I will try to do better next time but in my defense you know what
a scatterbrain I am at times, and when you don't spell it all out I get
confused. I just finished burying someone up to their neck in shit but I
might of put them in upside down
--
Lynn VOF+ Leaper
"Everyone seems normal until you get to know them."



"Mike M" <mikemcig-free@mindless.com> wrote in message
news:5tc9c4lpuobnbjoo9mlghctp2r1ae20f01@4ax.com...
> I'm pissed off at the BDU. I told them to bury her up to her ankles.
> Well I guess thats what they did, but I meant for her to be head down
> not tup.
>
> Mike M

Well how could AS3 be better? Hmmm how about all the guys get big bone
crushing hugs from CuckooCat and the ladies get Robin for a few minutes
I have been a long time from home but I'm here to say AS3 is the second
most important thing in the world to a new quitter.......the first should be
a tie between your quit and family.
Now gimme a big hug Cat
(((((((((CuckooCat))))))))))

Steve and Sarah
One year, ten months, three weeks, six days, 10 hours, 12 minutes and 6
seconds. 17435 cigarettes not smoked, saving $6,974.25. Life saved: 8 weeks,
4 days, 12 hours, 55 minutes.

"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

>Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite everyone's

We can't. We're a large, multi-cultural group, multi-national group
of people who have come together in search of one goal. That one goal
is what keeps this group going. That one goal is what makes AS3,
IMHO, a family.

We all know the old saying, "you can choose your friends but you can't
choose your family." None of us can choose who posts & reads here.
Everyone - EVERYONE - working on the same goal is welcome, regardless
of their method, gender, age, work status, race, ethnicity, country of
origin, etc. etc. etc.

I may not like everyone here, but I'll just roll my eyes, turn my back
or ignore those things I don't like, just like I do with my real life
family. Like it or not I'm stuck with you and you're stuck with me.
That's family.

((((((((((Big group hug))))))))))

--
BessieBee
"Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?"

That is a great and positive post BessieBee!

BessieBee wrote:
>> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite everyone's
>
> We can't. We're a large, multi-cultural group, multi-national group
> of people who have come together in search of one goal. That one goal
> is what keeps this group going. That one goal is what makes AS3,
> IMHO, a family.
>
> We all know the old saying, "you can choose your friends but you can't
> choose your family." None of us can choose who posts & reads here.
> Everyone - EVERYONE - working on the same goal is welcome, regardless
> of their method, gender, age, work status, race, ethnicity, country of
> origin, etc. etc. etc.
>
> I may not like everyone here, but I'll just roll my eyes, turn my back
> or ignore those things I don't like, just like I do with my real life
> family. Like it or not I'm stuck with you and you're stuck with me.
> That's family.
>
> ((((((((((Big group hug))))))))))
>

--
Reminder: don't forget to let my inner child loose...

Improve this NG? I don't think there is anything to improve. And I don't
think there is anything broken, to fix. Like everybody said, we are all
here bonded by one thing. Quit Smoking. There will always be topics that
do not relate, but it does not make it wrong. It just makes it a different
topic. I chose not to read it, if I don't like the subject. I get from
this group what I need. And for 16 months, I got all the help I needed,
thanks to every single person that posts here.

Is everybody going to agree with me or you on everything? Hell no. That
would be like living in The Soviet Union, when it was what it was. BUT,
that does not make them wrong. It just make their opinion different than
mine. Isn't that what life is all about?
--

AZ
http://www.myspace.com/alazikra


"CuckooCat" <silly@laughing.net> wrote in message
news:mI2dnYK4SdWKGFnVnZ2dnUVZ_qDinZ2d@comcast.com. ..
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

CuckooCat wrote:
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk, yet
> email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree with him
> that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite everyone's
> tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m 2w
> 3d 23:35 life saved

IMO there's nothing wrong with AS3.
Sue

You are so fracken feisty Sue!

Sue wrote:

>
> IMO there's nothing wrong with AS3.
> Sue




--
Reminder: don't forget to let my inner child loose...

Reading this thread one could easily come to the conclusion this newsgroup
is perfect. Not just fine, but perfect. There is another side however.
Pretty
much the only ones speaking up, are people that have been around for quite
a while. Check the thread and you'll basically see a who is who of AS3,
right?
And everyone of them stuck around coz the place is working for them. Not
perfect, but working for them. And a lot of us, I say 'us' coz you can put
me
on top of the list, are quite defensive about this place. Hell, it helped me
potentially
save my life. So don't fuck with it.

Now, if all the people that stuck around are people that are relatively
happy with
this place, there's a big chance people wanting change in most cases would
be
the relative new ones. Ever seen what happens when someone starts bucking?
We jump them, coz often it feels like they are messing with this place. So
it's not
without risk to go in against the majority vote here. We'll tell them what
we think
and everyone that has been around for a while knows we tend to make up
afterwards
and don't hold a lot of grudges here. Oh, and most of us will go easy on
people
with relatively new quits. But still, if you want change in this place you
better know
what you want, be very fucking eloquent and have a real thick skin and a
pair of
brass balls coz you'll be up against the before mentioned relatively happy
who's
who telling you this place is just fine the way it is. Often in no uncertain
terms.
So I can imagine people could perceive being jumped and verbally slapped
around
a bit as bullying. Especially when you don't read every post in every
thread, coz you
tend to miss a lot when you don't.

On a side note: people that tell other people to change so their own lives
will be
better often deserve a little slapping around in my book.

What I've seen is that there is no real need to try and change this place.
AS3 is a
dynamic community that changes over time, without people forcing it one way
or
the other. When I came here 5 years ago, it often had the feeling I was
watching
stand-up comedy. The place was packed with running jokes and witty people,
often as rude and coarse as can be. Had this feel of getting drunk with your
friends
most days. Google the word 'fuck' and news:alt.support.stop-smoking will
come up
with a Brazilian hits. These days I feel it's a lot more serious and mellow
in here. So
mellow I didn't even fucking get this discussion about the F-word. These
days more
and more people post what's going on in their daily lives and to me it feels
a lot more
like coming home to family. And I'm sure in 5 years it'll have a completely
different feel
to it. And I'm sure the people frequenting this place in 5 years will still
go out of their way
to help others in their struggle to quit smoking.

Having said that. Most of the people I've met here, both on and offline,
are friendly
characters that probably realize only dead fish swim with the current. So
polish up them
gonads and speak your mind if you think the place could be better in any
way. It might
not change a thing and you might bump into a few people that will go out of
their way to
prove you wrong. People here fight hard, and they don't always fight fair.
Fuck that. We
don't have a lynch mob here and no one is going to eat ya. The worst that
can happen is
you get a verbal spanking. You'll live, and it beats writing behind the
scenes 'people in AS3
are evil' emails. Uhh, yeah.. I know from experience from that time I
suggested we'd all take
up naked clog dancing. In all seriousness, I do remember swimming upstream
in that quit list
drama a few years ago. Drove me bonkers, but it was well worth it. If you
really stand for
what you believe, speak up. Just grow a pair of balls first and bring yer
thick skin.

What could be better? I suggest a 'funniest post award', like they have in
news:misc.fitness.weights. And again, I still think this place would be a
lot
better if we all spoke Dutch and clog danced naked daily. Oh, and I'll fight
anyone who doesn't agree dammit. Uhhh, in Dutch preferably.

Brilliant topic Cat!
(((e-re-e)))

"CuckooCat" <> schreef in bericht ...
> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk,
> yet email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree
> with him that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking, as someone
> who tries to give back and help the new quitters...
> PLEASE tell me what we could be doing better.
> To hell with this snippy secret emailing. This is a support group, not a
> soap opera.
> LIVES ARE AT STAKE.
> Please let us know how we can improve this support group to suite
> everyone's tastes.
> Thank you.
> Hugs,
> Cat
> ---
> 2y 8m 3w 5d 11:20 smoke-free, 40,027 cigs not smoked, $8,005.40 saved, 4m
> 2w 3d 23:35 life saved
> Ex-serial-quitter!
>
>

On Sep 8, 7:46*am, "Steve And Sarah" <sandskrie...@NOSPAM.yourlink.ca>
wrote:
> * Well how could AS3 be better? *Hmmm how about all the guys get big bone
> crushing hugs from CuckooCat and the ladies get Robin for a few minutes


That's it....... I vote for that!!!!!!

Yeah, remember Kathleen posting about three positive threads
for one negative one? Great way to change the place positively.


"Robbster" <> schreef in bericht ...
> I've decided that I will contribute by posting helpful articles once
> again
>

silly@laughing.net wrote:

> Just a note to the 189 people who emailed AZ, the discontents who lurk, yet
> email the other malcontents, the people who emailed Wayne to agree with him
> that profanity is used here?.....
> Please, PLEASE, as someone who cares immensely about this newsgroup, as
> someone who took all I could from here to help me quit smoking,